Without Frontiers

Without frontiers
My darling, do not dim out the lights
I'd rather see you not in silhouette
Casting my eyes over you
Inhale, the scent of you
You're wonderful to look at!!...
Admiring, your physicality
standing there
Painting me with your eyes,
And with each brush stroke each touch
Making me feel like a queen!
Seeing, desire in your eyes, I melt within!!
Ne me quitty pas!
For you are all the constellations above me,
my moon my stars...
And all else in between my, universe and I...
It was written in the stars, that you and I were meant to be
But something tells me, in your ambiguity,
Thinking twice!
But for you, I must fight you've grown roots in my heart.
So full of you my mind, obsessively so.
But in my ambivalence, a jot I care not...
All or nothing must be, don't you see!
Look at me one more time, darling before you go
To embed the image of you deeply into my soul
To last the rest of my days in my world...
Pretend I cannot or understand what, you are to me
Inflaming my mind every word uttered by you
Carry on I cannot, with the thought that one day
You'll walk from me!
A soul in turmoil I'll be, know not why I adore you this way,
I just do!
You might as well ask the stars scintillating in my skies
Why they scintillate before my eyes...
And the moon in her element why she shines for me
Leaving me in this torment ambiguously...
Why do they shine I know not...
Would I be, like a dying star would I!!
Little by little extinguishing in the firmament I've built
Once so bright, now mostly in silhouette
A star dying puff!!
My darling, drinking the essence the wonder of you...
You are the spring where I was born,
My tears like rivulets feeding the roots in my heart...
Look at me my darling and smile, won't you
Leaving me with the illusion that you cared for me
Little by little voluntary reason, I cannot
You cannot reason with my heart
This obsessive obsession...
Without, barriers or frontiers
For there are no frontiers,
When it comes down to you!!

The Senses

The Senses

Ambiguous words burning my senses
Just like that kiss lightly brushing mine
But the hunger from your lips
Sending shivers down my spine
With each word burning, a hole in my mind...
That hungry look in your eyes, as I stand before you
The way you look at me, am mesmerised...
Reaching to touch your face...
I can see that devilish look in your eyes
As I reach to kiss your eyes the tip of your nose
Taking thirsty hungry, little sips I kissed your lips
Burning my mind!!
Kissing that hollow just below your throat
Your shoulders biceps to your fingertips...
Then back to that indentation below your throat...
Your excitement excruciating never knew I had this hold
Under my hands, you're mine...
O'my! travelling to each of your nips you, shudder
Looking at you, that grin in your eyes
Endorphins my blood my mind, soaring high...
Like a piano's ivory's feeling your ribs
I can feel the beating of your heart...
Kissing your belly, each hip, in turn, a slow grown,
satisfied!!
Carrying down my path, like a map...
The incandescence of your touch, playing with my mind...
You're the very air I breathe my heart, my soul. 
You are the spring where I was born and in turn
I am lost in your arms, kissing your knees legs,
I can feel your mind...
Reaching your feet, kissing each toe in turn
Enough you, contest!
In our blood, our mind's the fire's beyond return...
Nothing mattered, nothing at all...
Reaching out to me and I pretend not to see
So sure you became pulling at me!
That primitive look in your eyes, smilingly
And when lovers meet our minds we do speak ...
What you need from me and me from you
Making me scream!!
You can play me like a fine piano, at times allegro
others pianissimo...
Like the dulcet tones of Vivaldi
To the masterful Tchaikovsky...
Soaring high in ecstasy my mind and, I
Beyond Infinitum, goes I!! 

Just Missing You

Just Missing You!

Hello, my lovely!
Minds in turmoil when it should not be
There's a certain ambiguity about me!
A sadness taking control of me
I know not what's to be!!
Give up you never do and it's so like you
Caring for those like me, that live in ambiguity
When control I cannot, what comes spewing out
When sadness takes control, of this being residing in me 
I would love to be free, from this uncertainty
Taking hold of me!! 
Yet happiness inherently within me, as I
open my eyes and see,
An unparallel word stretching before me 
Crying out my heart in the ecstasy, by the beauty I see.
But I do hurt my lovely!! 
This ache I carry within me, know not why!
Control, I cannot this feeling taking hold of me
Yet I know, I know it shouldn't bother me...
Missing you my lovely!
Away, you've gone from me...     
When I need you, beside's me
Missing your arms around, hugging me
In my dreams, I see you
In the distant horizon, far from me     
In my mind's mind, I can see
Imaginings!!
Smiling down at me, kissing loving me 
How I miss your eyes, playing games with mine
Dancing mischievously...
Getting a reaction from me! 
How I love your exuberance, making me feel
Making me feel that am real!!
All the while laughing, at me with me
How I love to see laughter in your eyes
As you laugh uncontrollably
Missing you my lovely
Just missing you!!     

Stars In your Eyes

If there are stars in your eyes
Go not into the other side of midnight
A chance I have not to close my eyes
Raging against the darkness, of the dying light
In the eyes of their mind
Beyond midnight do not go
If there are stars in your eyes
Fighting against the darkness of all times
Wise men know not if the night is right
In the depths of their darkest minds
On their lips, forked words exist not
In the lightness of their minds
Brave men weeping, waving their last goodbyes
Frailty means needs not, saying
If their deeds were mindful at all times
Go not into the other side of midnight
If there are stars in your eyes.
On those golden fields dancing in the moonlight
Holding you close by!
Raging in the darkness, of the dying light
Dispersing from their eyes
Go into the other side of midnight
If there are stars in your eyes
Watching the rising of the sun, feral man
Sang and danced into the light so bright
Grieving they learned not, the lateness of their deeds
The stars dispersing from their eyes
You see by thread men hanging 
Blinded euphorically
Blasing embers of meteorites
Fire in their blood, their minds dancing gaily
Go not beyond the midnight hour
If the stars are in your eyes
Raging faith against the darkness of the night
When there's light in the dark, of their nights
Dying light imminently, from their eyes
Go not into the other side midnight...
If they're stars in your eyes. 

Eternal Breeze

Eternal Breeze

Marvellous creature...
Says he, lying down beside me
His hands softly over me
Sending frissons through me!
My senses overflowing.
But my mind's on he
He doesn't see me
Invisible, I'll be! 
I guess I'm just a pebble on the beach.
Thrown up by the sea back and forth whooshing
A grain of sand crushed over, millennium
That a pebble once used to be
A mere speck of dust flowing through, eternal breeze
Beyond the clouds dancing swaying in the
Hemispheric winds...
Nothingness, I seem to be just another speck of dust.
You can't, see!!
But my heart, cry's look, at me!
Look at me in the eyes and see
This being living breathing...
A troubled mind thinking only of thee
Why treat me abhorrently, punishing me!!
I guess it'll teach me thinking of you won't do
And yet perpetually on my mind, you seem to be
Like a wound, a cicatrize that won't heal!
Damn you!
Waterfalls flowing silently from the core of me
Behind those waterfalls hiding, so they can't see me.
Fragmenting within...
Into tiny little pieces a mosaic impossible to finish
That speck of dust that you know its there,
but can't see...
Yesterday by the sea, I did lie waves washing over me.
Thinking of He!
And my tears flow like a river, as I wept quietly.
My seas were blue, my skies.
The gulls swaying, in the thermal winds
Gazing, watching dancing in the breeze.
Wonder how gulls feel and the kestrels above me.
As they dance and sway with ease...
Is there any purpose in the way they think...
I'd love to be a bird flying through the sky, with ease.
Thinking not, feeling seeing nothing!
Troubling not one's mind, caring not a jot
I'd love to be such a bird. 
Being carried into Infinitum
By the eternal winds
Looking back not at He!!

Ambiguous Ways

Ambiguous Ways

If my eyes are the windows to my world
Then you're the one keeping me sane keeps me alive
Stopping me from combusting like a volcano...
Using my mind,
Seeing all the goings on around me...
I see your eyes following me, every which way I turn
Confounded am I, by your interest in me
Never knew, I had this curiosity that others would
Stand and stare, as if I were this extreme, je ne c'est quoi!
I've always wondered why they'd look at me
It's not as If I were a beauty, you see
Most times felt uncomfortable, by the stares
What vibes was I giving them, I'd ask my friend...
Do I look like a slapper in my, deportment!
I've never acted unseemingly, that wasn't in me
But I always loved to joke and laugh, just like anybody...
I've always been uncertain, of the way I looked
Quite ugly I thought, was I!
My neck too long, boobs I hardly had any
My feet too big, my butt...
Well, I liked not!!   
The whistling the comments, coming my way!
Really hated passing by a man, their stares...
The boy used to say, the power you have in you
With just one look one stare, so innocent you are
You could have had anybody!!
How was I suppose to know, I've loved but one man
I guess I was the innocent!
But if I were this beauty, no one ever let me know
If such a looker was I, for I never saw it myself
Quite ordinary thought I...
Why did they hate me!
I never understood beauty such as me, never saw myself
As anything but, this soul that would hide from all, and sundry
And my soul cried out please set me free
From the windows of my world, embarrassingly
Now I've passed my sell-by date, they still do stare at me!
Making eye contact as I pass by...
And there's me, starring ahead unflinchingly!!   
And the boy still says, your a beautiful woman
You could have had anybody!
But my soul cry's, please set me free, from the eyes of my world
Making my life a misery!!
Ambiguously turning away embarrassingly
Knowing not how to act, by the uncomfortable stares
Making me feel so unclean!!
If my eyes are the windows to my soul, then my nose it's, chimney
I've such an acute sense of smell, in my vicinity scenting the air
The scent all around you attacking one's senses
Leaving you senseless, as coming down to the scent of he!
The endorphins his pheromones...
You are lost in a world, intoxicatingly in the scent of, he!
Confoundedly...
The scent of the rain leaving that earthly smell
And the intoxicating flowers so heady the scent
Filling one's senses...
My ears I guess are the earphones of my world
The sounds of your baby's very first cry!
You're mesmerised by that little creature, making that protesting sound
As he came into the world...
And the crying never stops from the day one's born, till one dies
The sounds of laughter as one laughs and laughs again
That uncontrollable laughter, that hurts...
Some joke or other recounted yet again...
But the best sound to me is the sound of music
The music Papa instilled in me
It can make me laugh cry and whoop with ecstasy!
I have a piece of music for my every mood, whether am sad or glad.
Music has always been my salvation, from the highs to low's
A safety valve, from going over the edge...
Indeed, music feeds my soul!!
Setting my senses high, unimaginable sounds 
Lifting my spirits like high that condor, swaying on the thermal winds...
My lips my mouth at times in controversy
I say what I think it does not worry me...
I speak as I see, and try not to hurt anybody
My lips making the sounds as I kiss you
Your eyes your lips, down to your fingertips
As I whisper your name...
My voice accentuates my love for you...
I miss you when you're not there, it hurts my darling
It hurts when you ignore me!!
I need to hear those phrases, that only you can extol
Feeding my mind heart, imaginings!
That everlasting balm, making life bearable
For am starved with the need to hear you say, what if
What if my darling, what if I were to say
I love you!
The sense of touch at my fingertips and yours
Unimaginable, the senses navigating through you
As you touch me lightly almost like a breeze
The touch of the night silently, sending tremors through you
Whispering silently, your hands over me...
This sense as a butterfly depositing upon you,

from your head to your toes kissing you... One's mind working overtime...
The urgency of your touch sending shivers to my mind
The uncertainty the ecstasy in how to deal, with such feelings
Cruising through you...
As I touch you lightly ever so lightly,
With my lips my mind the whole of me
Crying out for release, one's mind...
Sweet surrender!!

Dancing Alone

Through my mirror glass, I see you
Starring at me!!
As I brush my long hair...
That look that tells me, how wrong can I be
Shining for me the light in your eyes...
Me that adores you with every ounce, in me.
I hate when you're away from me!
Missing your arms around me...
Running down my staircase 
Catching up with you...
The intensity of your gaze
My breath escaping from me
My heart bursting from my chest
Almost killing me...
My primal feelings
In my primitiveness, this wanting of you
Help I cannot.
This obsessive obsession
Missing you... 
My eyes are missing you
My arms, my body's craving for you
Hungrily kissing your lips
As you hold me close, to you 
It's never enough,
To be at one with you!
There's a wild side, inherently within you
The euphoric's blowing my mind can never be enough
On that gossamer cloud dancing, I'll always be
The moon in her full bloom, scintillating
Beaming at me...
Awestruck, lost in time dreaming
Your eyes blue, smiling as we're dancing
Inwardly, my highs, intermingling with my low's
Not at all in sync with me... 
All I need is to see a likeness of you
And am lost in time, my mind
In the essence of you...
Looking into your eyes blue
Making me feel!
Ahh darling, making me feel!
Into overdrive goe's I
When it comes down to you
Like an enchantment bewitching me
Making me feel real!!
There's, a madness running through me
In mine primitive mind I see you
Bewitchingly, I see you, see you!!
Shivers tingling my spine 
Awol I go irrevocably...
In my blood a madness so sweet
There goe's I helplessly
As I circle my arms around me
As am dancing alone
Fragmenting...

Poetry's In Your Blood

Poetry's In Your Blood

Poetry's in your blood as music's in mine
The touch of your face
Like a feather lightly touching mine
The look in your eyes tells me am not wrong
Gazing at you!
Hunger from our lips, taking tasty sips
There's only the moon to lighten our path
And a little rain to quench our thirst
The rain bothers us not
It's irrelevant as lovers meet
As we speak...
Fires in our blood!!...
Incandescently, burning our minds
As we cling...
Our gaze never leaving the other
Into our souls seeing!...
You are my sun my moon and the stars
You are the highest mountain that, I must climb
For without you, my darling there is no life
As I see you!...
See you in the eyes of my mind.
My eyes light at the sight of you
My face glistening like the sun,
An aura surrounding you...
When you're not there
Missing you!!
Searching you, mind in despair
Flying high like a kite, as I see you
a bird in the sky...
In the extremities of my mind
Caressing you...
Reaching you one more time
Poetry's in our blood
In the recesses of my mind 
Kissing you!!

Our Mother Earth

This is more of an essay
An epic kind of my mind turning
You're welcome to read if you care to...


                Our Mother Earth
The heartbeat of our world it's breath raspingly
As if counting our heart beats one two and three
Like a bellows, pumping oxygen, into our world
Puffing gently as she breathes, deeply so alive is she...
Our mother earth...
She's home can you not see, intoning for all to hear her voice
As she sings imploringly...
The Vibrations carrying far and wide
From the mountain highs the savannahs, the valleys down below
Her intonation rising beyond the sky's, far and wide
Where condors sway on the thermal winds...
Beyond our firmament swaying, dancing in the breeze
Her complexity, understand one cannot
As she moves from A to B
Upon her shoulders carrying her lot, so strong is she
Ambiguity cannot distract desert her world,
One could forget not her complexity...
Her diversity is there for all to see, as she watches you and me
If only we would open our eyes and see,
The awesome panorama surrounding thee...
Her beauty by far, can you not, see...
In the savannahs, going about their world, the beasts
In their minds resides not greed no ambiguity!
Taking their necessity's as they need, there's no greed
Enrichment, not on their minds, no siree!
The rainforests, once a sight to see, their density
A diversity of colour's
The richest's autumnal colours mesmerisingly
The profoundness of colour defunct intense colours
Cascading gently from their canopy's
The reds, the rusts the bronzes intermingling with the gold
Before your eyes the richest carpet, you've ever seen
Above their canopy, naked they'll be
Displaying before our eyes,
Proudly their beauty at our feet falling...
Waterfalls exuding from the depths of she, anguished tears
The densest gossamer clouds, such as the density
Impeding us from visualising her intensity
Leaking from her eyes tears of pain in sorrow
Her diversity is such, that in, a blink of an eye dispersing
Before you realise what's she's all about...
Nature abounds everywhere.
Before your eyes so attuned you become to the sounds,
Surrounding you, a symphony a chorus above the canopy's
From the birds to the chimpanzees, a right cacophony
As the swans the condors, the flamingos swaying on the breeze
And all those in between, all the little birds of our world
O'why can I not be a bird flying high,
Riding those thermal winds, why can not I!
In my imagination there goes I,
Swaying floating through those eternal winds of life
So attuned was I!
Swerving dancing in between a gossamer of clouds never ending
Beneath our oceans our wondrous seas...
Wales touching fins as if dancing the Danube
So attuned were they...
A kaleidoscope beneath our oceans
A diversity of colours one's mind overflowing
In intensity...
Way above the clouds the bluest of skies
Stars glistening like fairy lights, beyond our universe
And on the dawning, morn unfurling before me
The rising sun in its immensity rivers of gold viscus
Tumbling into the seas
Like an entity, bright like a diamond casting her eyes upon me
 A new day a new life a new hope a new meaning
A new beginning for you for me...
But our mother earth's hurting, destroying polluting nature's life
The greediness of our world, wanting to grasp
This greed wanting more than we need...
Destroying our forests murdering, wildlife satisfying their greed
Killing those awesome creatures for their tusks,
Not our medicines, their elusive aphrodisiacs come into it
Those awesome creatures living, breathing beating hearts 
Like yours and mine...
Hunting them down, murdering for profit
In our obtuseness, had the tables been turned, hunting us down,
Killing us slowly extracting our bones, crushing down
For that elusive magic potion, that kick up the pants
That aphrodisiac, or so they believe...
Why can't they just live and let live!
From robbing their coats, guarding us against the cold
Not what their about...
They're destroying our forests murdering raping, our world
Leaving desolation wherever they roam, a land scarred
Flagellation of the wild for their own gratification fighting dying for their greed...
Chemically poisoning our world, contaminating being plundered of its life...
Forcefully feeding those unfortunate creatures
Stuffing our faces greedily, an abhorrent sight
As if a tomorrow there wouldn't be!
The rainforests, the indigenous peoples to the animals
A land scarred, a world now extinct from fauna and foul lands
These so-called intelligent beings, killing destroying our world
Extracting, bleeding it dry, until there's nought to give 
Desolation all around you, wanting to rule our world
There'll be nought left to rule,
Accursed human beings hurt to say...
Eating our way into, extension, it sickens me to witness the greed!
The destruction, now naked our forests, being brought
down to their knees...
Those greedy cooperative bastards!!       
Leaving nought but destruction behind,
Desolation wherever they roamed!
Our world crying tears of blood, misery abounds
Our sea's our icecaps are melting down
Oceans flooding our lands...
Whether there's time enough, turning things around
Too late would you say?
Only God knows!!


 

Feline Cat

Feline Cat!
Waking up stretching high
Arching my back touching the sky
Tentatively his hands speaking
Feline slender cat,
Says He...
On the catwalk, you should have been
Miaw, as I nuzzled up to him!
Taking a nip from his lips
Running my nails down his spine
You could have had anybody!
His hands softly whispering, over me ...
Know not what He sees about me!
His look confounding me
Flummoxed am I!
From my early teens at me,
He looks thus.
I kissed his eyes...
Holding me in a vice,
I can't breathe!
From my head to my toes,
kissing, me...
At all times whispering...
What did I do to deserve, you
Meaningful or not I cared not
As he kisses me,
A tear spilling from my eyes
Setting my senses way up high...
Speaking to me his hands,
I know not, my mind overflowing...
If it's love or lust
I have awakened the beast in me
Whisperings into my, soul, was he
But, my minds been on him!
Desire, in the forefront of my mind
Moving in time, my body...
But reach I cannot the heights
As if punishing me,
On my mind perpetually
Reaching touching his mind, with mine
Abandonment lost in time...
Looking into my eyes taking hold of me
At that moment in time,
There was no returning for me
I called out his name euphorically
Arching my back reaching for he
That feline cat abandonly...
Digging my nails into He!
His eyes the colour of a stormy night
Looking through me...
I soared high like that Albatross
To hell and back taking me!!

Enough's Enough...

I knew that would be a reaction from you!!
Had no other choice...
As I saw your hi there,
A waterfall came pouring from, me
Here on this sofa he's, quizzically looking at me
Stand, I could not any longer...
You're, playing psychological games with me...
For a long time, you've been off hand
I knew not why!
All I knew was that I was hurting
Why am I hurting!
I've asked myself many a time
Et Tu darling!!
You know I've never ever, let a man get to me
In all my life...
I must have been touched, in the head
Going soft!
But somehow you got under my skin
Bad karma for me!
I've needed you as a friend,
But after all these years you started,
playing games with me...
Six-seven years or thereabout...
We've played a little game along the way
Seeing how far we could go...
Although I wasn't too good at those but
I quite liked those little games, making me feel alive
Feeling good!!
Was it so bad making me feel good?
But you must see that wasn't just me alone,
you were there too...
What did I do to fall by, the wayside?
Up to 2017 you still liked what I did, my words
But between spring and summertime, I've lost you!
At every attempt at communication, you ignored me
Whenever I asked are you ok!
Never an answer to my questions...
I was fragmenting, missing you!!
I knew we were beyond those little games
I minded not, I guess experience, not to be repeated...
But you brought out feelings, I knew not existed
Hating myself!
Bloody fool even now I'm weeping...
I knew not, one could shed so many tears!!
Now and then you'd, come back with your hi there!
Playing psychological games, with my mind!!
Never saying anything of consequence...
You probably thought let's see how far, you can
push me!!...
Psychologically I can take no more...
Enough's enough!
I really liked you, darling I had no illusions about you
You were just my friend, I loved talking to.
But in the end, the thought of talking to me became
Abhorrent to you!
But no worries, I guess nought I can do
Knowing not why!
You've forsaken me!!
Ciao!!

Where Are You, Moon

Where are you, Moon
You went awol don't, you know
I've searched you, near and far
Behind a gossamer veil hiding, were, you!
I stood around just, waiting for you
Settle could not, up and down
Searching...
You were nowhere to be seen...
Then I spied you chasing Venus
I saw you all aligned, Mercury and Mars
But that wasn't enough for you
You had to chase Uranus Jupiter and Pluto too!
Don't you know Moon!
There's an earthling, waiting for you
To beam your light upon her
Don't you know, you mesmerise her
Your beauty like no other
Your visage's sublime!
I've searched high and low
Right across my firmament
But there was no sign of you, Moon!
I knew you were there...
Behind, that ethereal gossamer veil
In readiness, I stood camera in hand
To record your first appearance...
But you were playing hard to get
Leaving me, with this imbalance
Starring up to my skies
They though me mad!...
But I saw you there fleetingly
With Venus besides you
With Mars in the vicinity smiling
Her indolent red smile,
Shamelessly.
Amazing this alignment
I saw with mine, own eyes
With the help from my binoculars
An amazing sight for sore eyes
But you my dear, my dearest Moon
In your full bloom...
Casting shadows upon my mind...
What a magnificent Moon says, I!
Now each time I see you
You hide beyond that gossamer cloud
Pretending you see not me!
You have always affected, my moods
Rather irrational I become and that's no joke
Excitedly I point you out to my children
Look at that beautiful Moon, in her full bloom
Come my baby's howl lets howl at the Moon!
And like a banshee I howled!!
Is this strange or not, am afraid I don't know
But the Moon has always,
Affected, me so!!

Like A Banshee

Like a Banshee...

Hollering was, she like a banshee
For in her mind, couldn't see He
He that was taking her sanity...
In her ambiguity, she cried
Whenever she thought of he
Peace of mind she had not
Her mind so full of, he...
He that reawakened her, from her dead living limbo
Spilling inside out feelings, a right cacophony
Whenever she thought of he.
Oh dear lord, his eyes so blue
The incandescence of his gaze, shining through 
Is he thinking of she, possibly!
She calls, his name yet again, in her mind
Becoming restless when he answers, not she
Sleep cannot, going over, he perpetually
Obsessively, she calls his name time and again.
His eyes the colour of her skies will be
The intensity, the immensity of, he!
His eyes watching over me
A balm he can be to me...
Calming her mind, her curious mind
Perpetually, wondering when will he
In her ambivalence, inherently
Hollering like a banshee...
In the regions of her mind, escape an impossibility
For her mind so full of he!
Disperse from her mind will he ever be,
In all ambiguity!!
Let there be light transcending
Into the very depths of me
For in darkness I cannot be!!
Let the light sip through, dispersing
Darkness from my mind
For in silhouette he cannot be...
For when the day's through still thinking

about, he...
At the going down of the sun
Hollering she must not be
Like a banshee!
Towards his skies, she stares
Or wherever he may be...
Let the light disperse not from her mind
Her imaginings, intoxicatingly
Stars in her eyes always will be
When it comes down to he!!
In the darkness of her nights
Letting light sip through
Just enough to see you
In the eyes of my, mind
Was he irrevocably...

The Dancing Girl

The Dancing Girl


Dancing wild by the firelight, was I
Losing myself uninhibited,
Dancing in the flames of life
Jumping higher and higher
Dancing manically, into a frenzy
As if a tomorrow, there wouldn't come!
Undulating to the sounds of those drums
Transcending through me, euphorically
In a trance my brain...
Into a frenzy that beat getting to me
In abandon, arms, reaching for the skies
Whilst jumping over the fire was I!
Echoing through me euphorically!
The applause, an opium to my brain
Jumping higher, without refrain
Drums beating euphorically, like a drug my blood
My senses with no defences, my mind,
In a trance...
For my life dancing indolently, for he
Undulating to those drums!
I danced like the wind, whispering, between the trees
Whispering in the breeze rustling, through fallen leaves
His eyes were on me, his interest in me
Indolently I smiled at, he as he chiselled away
His hammer chip chipping away
My undulating body my face, embedded
on that rock...
Engraving my soul, deep within me
A stonemason working tirelessly
This manic woman dancing, swaying erotically
For her tomorrows dancing indolently
Losing herself to the beat of those drums
Like a bird swaying on the thermal winds
Whilst he, tirelessly sculpted her form from that stone
So in love was he, as he watched her undulating
Immortalising on that stone the dancing girl
In times forgotten ...
The sculptor, the dancing girl in a trance
Their romance...
Ageless here she rests embedded on stone
Sculptured for all to see
She who danced abandonly erotically
By far his best sculpture of, she
With his very hands, every line every sinew
Etched with love
Her immortality, carved in stone
The dancing girl,
And her sculptor in love!!

Do You Pray!

Do you pray!
I was asked the other day
Noo!!
Not anymore I must say
An unbeliever I've become
An agnostic I'll be!
Since a mere child was I
I've become un-enamoured with religion
A load of hypocrites they'll be
Runs in my family, hypocrisy
So abhorrent to me!
And so a rebel I've become, listen not to anyone
I do my own thing... 
But I believe there must be an entity
Someone higher
Much higher than you or me
A supreme being maybe!
But I believe not those priests, those purists
Pure they'll not be
The evilness in some of them
Scary!! 
Then I was asked...
What would you like most in the world
Well, that's not too hard, say I
I'd wish peace amongst the peoples of our world
To live in love and harmony, stop killing one another
Greed amongst them inherently there'll be
But I do ache inside of me...
Perpetually!
Tears flowing silently
My throat constricting my breath
Breaking into a sob, my heart's fragmenting
Into a thousand little pieces   
In between tears, I tell he!     
What I'd like most in the world
Would be to have my family back aswe used to be!
And looking into his eyes, telling him
That I!
Assiduously I try not to
Let it disperse from me trying, trying!
Bursting from me, my heart breaking
Into thousands fragmenting pieces
My worlds breaking around me   
I care not I think not, I cannot bear
They've gone from me!
Cannot pass the time of day
Always in a hurry by the way 
Even though saying how great I was
Fleetingly passing the time of day,
Running...
His features popped into my mind disturbingly
Know not what scares he!
Feeling uneasy...
Achingly my tears falling within me
Sorry for myself I guess I'll be
What annoys me most, my feelings! 
How I miss Papa, on this epochal time of year
The Stellar in my skies he was
He had diamonds scintillating, in his eyes
For us...
His arms huge as a bear hugging us
The light of love dancing in his eyes,
Our hero he was...
Nothing's worth this misery I feel within me
I'd so love to be free
From form the bastards of our world
To just to be me!!   

It's An Illusion

Looking into my mirrored glass, I see
A life that's gone before me
Taking my life my youth
And everything I held dear.
As I look into my mirrored glass
There are tears escaping my eyes
A torrent, a deluge unstoppable waterfalls
Escaping the very core of me!
Perturbed my mind my heart exuding, the pain!
My love's desired not...
By a silken thread hanging my life,
Echoing through my thoughts,
I knew it'll last not...
His feelings mine feelings...
My mind my heart if so desired
Were his...
From dawn to the going down of the sun
In the evening...
My thoughts were his!
And every second in between...
The tribulations, my mind is enough
I know not why am feeling,
This ambiguity, in turmoil my mind
Why should I care, if he wants not to stay!
But, gazing into my two hands
It's too late, to hold he, against me
To have to hold his visage in my hands
Caressing mine, his eyes
Whilst I whisper his name!
Hanging by a thread my life, a life am free not
to live...
Is it worth living it?
Before my eyes, I see, he the way he looks
Through me, wanting...
You've become the light of my life
A life that cares not if, it's lived or not
It's immaterial, that life is for living
Desolation resides in the recesses of my mind
Looking into his eyes I see not, love
Starring, into my eyes...
Scattering my mind my heart!!
Beyond the stratosphere...
Getting up from mine cocoon
Opening the curtains wide I see, desolation
A grey world starring at me
A gossamer impeding me from seeing, light
In the darkness of my mind...
What's up with me!
I cannot see the stars in his eyes...
There goes another tear,
another star falling from my skies!
Disguising his feelings, looking at me
But as I touch his mind with mine
I know I cannot hold him kiss him
It's killing me!
Aching for the touch, the very core of me
Looking, into his heart, seeing ambiguity
In his obsessivity...
Cannot hold me his mind
In its entirety...
Letting go, much easier
Dissipating from my mind, this illusion
But if free I cannot be,
to live in this ambiguity, I cannot
In the regions of my mind, no!
It's an illusion!!

Fires Still Burning

Darling!
Fires still burning in my, blood
That look in your eyes,
Incandescently, burning through me.
Marvellous, creature, says he
As I get up and brush my hair
Within you, fires still burning
Changed you have not!!
And I laugh gazing at, he...
For the decaying of me, he does not see.
Your still that girl, I first saw in that far away, land
Smiling shyly, just as you are now...
Just like an exotic flower, waiting to be picked
A bird of paradise, in the sunshine,
I fell for you then and there...
Now looking at you, you've lost not that elegance
I saw in you...
It's still there as you brush your hair
His eyes, following me every which way I moved,
That proud look in your eyes!!
The fires are still burning in his minds, eyes
Pulling me on to him...
I see not this mesmerisation he has of me!
Has been there from the start...
Yet I thought you mad, this obsessive hold on me
Fluttering butterflies, in my blood...
We had eyes for no other, coming back time after time
To mine island in the sun!
Making love with thine eyes...
Your camera lens spoke volumes, in my face
Wrapping me, on that staircase
Every angle of me you took, whispering,
Divine!
And you haven't lost that look, in your eyes
Fires burning all the while...
I feel your eyes, burrowing into me, as I moved
Yet at times I've doubted in, my mind
This love has lasted beyond time
For I had eyes not, for any other
Spoiling my chances of some other love.
Yet they won't let me be, chasing me!
Silly fools, go away let me pass...
For I have eyes for no other, but he!
Even today, at my sale of by date, they still do stare.
And I think bloody fools, making my life a misery,
With their looks...
But there are times, in my minds, mind
It seems I need, much more than I need...
Experiencing no other, was I missing something!!
Would love alone suffice, making me see
I need no other but he!!
A bed of roses has been not at, all times
For I, have a mind of my own...
Clashing at times, breathing fire like a dragon...
The devilishness in me...
But calming, down love has won, somehow
Yet I see the windows of my world looking, through me.
Am I missing something, unfaithful never been
Except at times my mind, wanting more than I need
For the fires, burning intrinsically...   
That elusive look, in his eyes
Simmering embers burning his blood, oh my!
The Stellar in my skies, you'll always be.
Making love triumphantly!...
Running through me my blood, the ecstasy
At that moment in time, escaping I wanted not
Consuming fires my mind my blood.
As he whispers yet again, you've changed not a bit... 
Thanking the lord, the decaying of me, he does not see
Even my tears extinguish cannot the fire,
As he eloquently brushes, his lips against mine
I cry out in the delirium of love
Burning embers consuming,
The fire in his eyes!!

In Your Eyes!!

In your eyes, I see that distant look
Gazing at this Autumnal vision
Of, impressive golds reds and rusts
And the silvers, slowly fluttering dancing
in the breeze...
Darling, look at me!
What do you see, you're so far from me
That far away look, back in your eyes
That look that tells me
That you may need, more than I can give
Or is it being whom I am...
Expecting too much from you
Much more, than your prepared to give 
Have I become too much for you!
Drinking the essence of you, my eyes
In my minds eyes, I see you
Caressing me...
Your eyes following me across the room
Beating like a drum my heart, boom, boom
Irrepressibly running away with me
Wishing you'd take hold of me, making me
feel real...
From across the street where I live
Just across the water from you
In my mind's mind, I see you so clearly
Through my window pane...
Even though these gossamer nets of my mind
Imped cannot me from visualising
The light in your eyes...
Ahh, darling!
Can you not see, me looking at you
The hunger in my eyes, in my very extremities
There I cannot go, you see...
I'd so love you to hold me.
I too can see, hunger in your eyes 
Nothing matters, nothing at all
Keeping your distance,
Me that adores you, feel you touch you
With my mind's mind, my heart...
In the darkness of my nights
I want you, need you to hold me
Telling me it's all right
As I whisper on to you...
Please, darling, do look at me
What do you see
Do you see me as I see you?
Or do you see me, as this infernal thing
In the eyes of your mind...
Misunderstanding me!
As I try reaching your mind
But, differently, your eyes are telling me
Wanting me, as much as I do you
But that won't do, I do know...
Just once darling just once
Would that do!
Would it be enough
Across from you, I stand to gaze
Lust in my blood, my mind
Or would it be love, I feel I know not!!
As we loved, in these Autumnal golden fields
With the leaves falling dancing in the wind
Just like any other being...
Exaltation reaching a crescendo
Euphorically...
Paramount in my mind
Absolutely nothing...
Above us a blanket of golden stars 
In the darkness of my firmament
Whispering, gazing into your eyes
My torment...
Knowing that in the recesses of my mind
Just for a moment!!

A Different me!!

       

O' poetry,
Poetry set me free
I owe you a different me!
I owe you my mind my heart my,
very soul...
And you owe me the kindness that,
you stole.
You owe me my loneliness,
my peace of mind.
My sleepless nights,
The silences, for your not there
But wandering the night, streets,
are calling as you're, roaming through
Sneaking quietly in the early morn...
At the clock, I glance surreptitiously
Coming home excitedly,
Reciting your words drunkenly
Phrases verses of poetry...
In my loneliness, longing for the touch
But, your perpetual drunkenness, sullenly!
I like you not this way!!
By the shore, I cried I cried in loneliness
In my ambiguousness, sorrow crucifying me
When I asked what happened to you?
You had no answer for me but said,
C'est la vie!
Instead, quoting a verse of poetry
In the darkness of my nights, searching you
With the approaching of a new dawn
The rising sun's imminent...
Over that mountain beyond the waterfall
Above the clouds peeking, through
Wearing its rays like a crown
Glistening little diamonds...
Trees are laden in dew, as the light seeps through
Frosted grasses glistening in the morning sun
Like dew tears forming behind my eyes,
kissing you!
Memories of times past...
So cold in the wet morning dew
That tinge of blue your lips hands, like ice
Running my hands over you just to warm you
Sitting forlornly along, the shore drunken 
Perpetually your drunkenness, your words
Such as Poetry!
O' Poetry, I owe you my world, my reason for living
My dying my freedom my life
Silently my tears are falling,
My secrets, in the depths of my heart
Residing within me I feel a stranger
Feeling so lonely, can you not see!!
O' Poetry!
I owe you the feeling of I, know not what
Of being born!
And my love of finding him, to lose again
O' Poetry !!
Poetry, I owe you,
A different me!!

Autumnal Times

Autumnal Times

Autumn's here to stay
Time to get out and play
Pointing my camera lens, every which way
Processing in my mind
The wonder before my eyes
Rustling through the autumnal, fallen leaves 
Dancing the Charleston making a game
Jumping and kicking,
Delving into ones, whispering mind 
Optimum richness, right up to your eyes
As one swims through those autumnal fallen leaves
Enriching my mind!!
The reds goldens the rusts
Snapping away each frame, as I meander through
Beneath my feet a carpet, mesmerisingly
That once in a wondrous canopy above
Proudly displaying in a vigour,
Sublime to my eyes!!
The awesomeness of summer in its gloriousness
Amongst its canopy, little birds chirping away 
In a symphony a chorus, in times of plenty
Gladdening my eyes once again...
I sigh in the very extremities of me, a sight
like no other... 
In autumn times forgotten...
Gazing whichever way you turn, magically enchanting
A chorus, a symphony, without refrain,
Melodiously singing in unison
Revibrating through the canopy  in the
evening cool breeze...
Keenly listening to their warbling sounds 
Attacking one's senses, a sight for sore eyes   
Magic abounds...
A case of sadness, of summer times, expiring
And I on a whim
Rustling through the autumnal, fallen leaves
Before winter times rushes in...

Alone!!

Alone!!


This morning my worlds pressing down on me!
There's a weight upon my heart
A gossamer over my eyes, wake I want not
Sorrow residing in my heart...
Loneliness, must I feel so alone
Those in my world understands not me 
What I am what I'll be
Turmoil residing within me!
Chastising my mind, for thinking not.
Spontaneity rules my world
Thinking not always...
But the ambivalence in me,
Living a day at the time, my way...
Care not always what I do or say!   
My nature's to love those in, my world
But if my phraseology fails by the wayside
In whatever I do or say!!
To speak my mind always my way
If those in my world care not to hear what I say
Best stay away!!
From a mind thinking not, always
At war, my mind and I what to do or say
My mind filters not my, thoughts in any way
Flowing through me, whether good or bad
Or indeed ugly...
The essence of me, why must I be me!
This being that knows not copes, cannot
Living from day to day...
Turbulence escaping, me my thoughts,
The very extremities of my mind... 
A being that does not sing and dance at all times
Sinking in the mire of my thoughts
When there's doubt in my mind...
Would rather, sing and dance at every change!!
Except, darkness stealing the light from my mind
Dispersing not that gossamer, impeding the light 
In the darkness, my mind
Alone!!

Rising Feelings ...

Rising Feelings

My eyes see, 

But cannot speak... 

Just, like that clap of thunder far away

Am a woman that walks alone, without experience 

of the world...

Might as well be a child, in all innocence;  

But a child kisses not your shadow, as they dance 

Hand in hand in the streets, interlocking hands

Dancing, as if we'd never let go... 

Why waste time sleeping, you'll be leaving 

in the morning,

And I'll be left weeping within the sorrow 

Immersing in the laughter, for the here and now 

For when you're gone...

I'll be left in the grips of the melancholy hereafter     

As I reach helplessly for that scintillating star.

With the feeling of emptiness, in my heart    

For when I kiss your eyes your lips, 

Downs to your fingertips...

For I know you'll be gone, far from me, from me!  

What will I do as midnight tolls away

And am reaching out to you, your not there!

I sleep awake sleep awake, in the thunder of the night    

My whole being trembling like, the trees in the forest 

As their leaves sway and dance, in the moonlight  

Leaving me all alone... 

As you've done without a thought in the world;

I shouldn't have said I loved you, 

Between that hill, that mountain high...  

Recollecting, refrain cannot from what was said 

The beaming moon, trailing you in mid light 

Has brought you, close so close

Whisperings, my mind...

To hold you, to feel to feel you, close to me

Hungry kisses brought us to an impasse...

The poetry that goes beyond, you and me!  

We have a hunger, our lips our eyes  

This thing between you and I 

Hurt feelings as you ignore me     

For am human, with feeling too

I can love-hate just, like you!! 

But as we clash, a turbulent mind

Touching your face your lips, with mine 

Feeling, love in my heart... 

As you came in from the storm,

Constricting my heart...

You are killing me my darling, 

With your poetry, your verses of love!! 

O'Lord!..

O' Lord
God turned the lights off
It'a dark as sin, my way,
Am I a terrible sinner
Living from my day to day,
To relieve darkness, from my
darkest days...
Naughty I can be when my, blues won't disperse away...
Setting on my mind, a dark gossamer cloud
The boredom I must lift,

a mind that wants to play...
Some word game, to keep my blues away...
It's gone as dark as sin
Haven't seen the sun in days
A distraction I must find
Otherwise, my mind will play havoc all-day
And it won't be a pretty day!!
I need brightens in my days, settling my mind
Casting light upon my eyes,
Lighting my path...
That otherwise will think, its winter times
When darkness permeates, my soul
Refusing to let light in,
My mind...
Struggling to see, lightness
Before darkness sets in...
If light cannot see, my soul tumbles down, on me...
I see, times changing beautifully
Enriching my mind an infusion of
Autumnal Colours...
Lifting that gossamer, impeding me, from seeing
A kaleidoscope, a vision
Cascading from their canopy's
Reds golds bronzes rust's, beneath my feet
Enriching a warm periphery vision, my eyes
A warm carpet of colour, feeling cosy within...
The awesomeness of an Autunamal, warm colours
In a transaction, a time for hibernation
Before winter rushes in...
Dispersing from me, that sad feeling
Some brights days hopefully
Keeping my blues away!!

Be Still My Heart

Be still my heart!

Lie still my silent, heart
Lie still.
Whilst am bleeding...
My worlds changed my, dreams...
Fragmenting...
Lie still my wounded heart,
Lie still...
Between spring and summertime
For a moment in time
In a beat of a heart
I've lost you...
Lie still, won't you lie still!
For there's nought I can do
In a mere whisper
In the blink of an eye!
I've lost you...
Be still be calm my silent heart
Arrest, your step won't you
Turn around,
For there's nought, here for you.
Be silent mind, of mine,
Be silent my heart
Whilst my tears flow
Beneath my rib cage,
I hear your rhythm...
Boom boom...
Lie still quieten down,
my beating heart...
Each time, I lay eyes upon, he
all over again giving me, shivers
Embers high burning my blood.
Calm down my, beating heart...
Be silent heart, of mine;
Won't, you be silent !!

Autumnal blues...

Darling Donde Estas!
Underground, have you been hibernating?
There's no sign anywhere of you!
Yet I know you're there...
Lying quietly in your misery,
On these Autumnal times...
This epochal season the times in between
Autumn and winter...
Like you, I too suffer from this, seasonal blues
This feeling of wretchedness...
Delepidating it can be, I do empathise
You know I do!!...
But darling beyond yonder, I see you
Riding your stallion, as if flying in the wind
I can sense, unquietness in your mind
As you ride that poor beast, into oblivion
So dapper, almost like a madness
In your blood...
Like a shadow swiftly flying me by
only hooves resounding,
Like a thunderbolt...
Escaping what I know, not...
But why run from me, darling?
You're ingrained in the recesses of my mind
You bring shivers to my spine...
And each time, I lay eyes upon you
I know I've lost the plot...
I've this hunger, this yearning oh my, darling!
If only you knew, what's in the regions of my mind
Nudging up to you, tempting you
kissing your mind...
You know, that hollow just below your chin
I run my tongue, then up to your lips
Taking little nips...
Your eyes dark pools inviting me,
I'll jump right in, feet first
Emerging, from those deep cool waters
Then jumping in again...
Following my every move, your eyes
Winking at me...
Then and there I knew,
I knew you wanted me as I did you.
Whispering in your ear, what shall we do!
Shall we lie beneath those palms
And make whoopie...
It takes every once of me, holding back
an impossibility...
The need was much stronger than me
Control could not the longing...
As I rose above you, I could feel your trembling
I kissed every inch of you
Convulsing, my mind my body...
Grasping for anchorage, falling into a chasm
of mine, own making ...
In the labyrinths, of my mind
I cried out your name, time and again
In the extremities of my mind, lost for all times
I took all you had to give...
Keeping the Autumnal blues, at bay
I kissed your mind your heart...
Tu Cuerpo, Siempre!!

Behind Your Dark Window!!

Behind Your Dark Window

Why do you hide, my love
Behind your darken window
Yet I know you're there my love
But you hide, hide from me!!
Do you recall not, what we were
When we were so in love   
Feromones wild, endorphins high
Or an illusion, my love
The obsessiveness, the need for the other
Our whole beings, obsessed
With the idea of being in love 
We had eyes for no other
Now you hide, behind your darken window
Pretending, you do not see!
And my mind's screams out for you
To hold me tight...
Yet my love you hide behind your darken window
Hiding from me!!
The ecstasy, of your nearness,
Drives me wild, this need for you!
But I must say my love,
You're so far from me, the way I feel for you
My primitive mind, this yearning!
You care, not my love
This longing!
This yearning I feel for you
Yet you hide, behind your darken window
Whilst am fragmenting!!
Do you remember my love, as we run around
Teasing!
Teasing one another, laughing like no other
The eloquence of your words
Drove me spare...
Burning in my mind, no other could share
The meaning of such, words leaving a deep sensation 
Within me! 
But you hide, behind your dark window
Ignoring me!
Yet once upon a time, we were so busy exploring
Exploring one another
Oblivious of all surrounding me
The words, the sweet, words tumbling from our lips
A hunger!...
Quenching our thirst, an impossibility
My mind so full of you...
But my love, you seem to have forgotten
As you hide behind your window...
Why are you my, love punishing me!
Is there a reason my love
Or you just don't love me!
By your words mesmerised, as
I must say silly me...
But one questions not, words of love
When one's young, foolish and free!!

Sayonara!!

He came to me, almost as in a mirage
From far distant lands...
Suddenly, standing before me was he!!
His hair floating in the breeze
For my eyes manna, he'll be
Looking through, to my soul his eyes
Adoring He!!
I see he, in the extremities of my mind
Burning intrinsically through me, my blood
My mind so full of He!
In the visions of my mind, embedded within me
How I adore, He!
In distant shores Japanese seas, I see He...
Konnichi-wa my lovely,
Standing before He daring he, to look at me
Looking into his eyes, drinking the essence of he
His hair the colour of the burning sun
His eyes O'dear Lord are killing me!!
The colour of my skies and the flax fields
In the distance, I can see...
I compare, He to my God, I adore He!!
Letting my hands run through his hair
Kissing the top of his, nose
So appealing I find He!
Ripe as cherries his lips drinking
the essence, of He...
Intoxicatingly!!
Removing his shirt, so well toned his body
I can feel his every sinew!!...
Smiling, knowing the effect, he has on me
Such a beautiful body...
Ahh! He knew!
He knew, the effect, playing me like a harp
My unruly mind inside, out in tatters
Help I cannot the effect
Barmy I'll be!!
Walking in his shadow, not me
But right there beside he
Atsui desu says, I
For I was burning embers as I kissed, he
Right there on deck...
A weakness overwhelming, me
Focussing an impossibility
All emotions running through me
Lost in time, rupturing my mind
Delirium euphorically...
Always lost I'll be, the effect he has, on me!
O-Yasumi Nasai...
Sayonara...

Te, Extrano

Te, Extrano!!

I compare thee to this wondrous sea
Knocking me off my feet, capriciously
Cool waters wading through
Caressing me assiduously
Instantaneously evoking from me
Into a frenzy, erupting that feeling irrevocably
Cannot abide this hopeless waiting,
Looking at me!
Te Extrano, Te Extano!!
Staying away from me...
Ecoching my tears, silently flowing
That Siren, I'll be dementedly
At the oceans, bottom hollering 
Calling to thee!!
In between the sands and rock pools
Are, as deep as my soul
At times as calm as can be, loving me!
Lulling me into to a sense of security...
Then turbulent, angry wild like Neptune
Bashing against the rocks, punishing me...
And I, that Siren recounting, secrets past singing
Echoing right through the seas...
But by the light of the moon, sailing by me
This wondrous sea, the dreamy night's,

darkness in your eyes... 

Sailing away...And I like that demented Siren,
Singing in the moonlight
Breaking her, heart as you sail by 
Yet here like a mermaid on this rock, I lie
Bathing by the light of the moon,
I could have swooned at the sight of you.
Opening my eyes, there you were gazing at me
That vision, before me wondering was it he!
Halfway rising myself, casting my eyes
The undulating waves swaying
Ebulliently, taking me...
Believe could not, that he stood by me 
Te Extrano, Te Extrano
Can't you see!
But my seas listens not to me, as I shout silently!
Te Extrano!!
Sailing by hearing not me!
Not a word to say, gazing my way!
Crying for a word uttered...
A smile missing from your eyes,
And like a Siren hollering my misery...
Yet you're looking back at me!
The light in your eyes, glistening...
You cannot disguise, it's there in your eyes;
No words to share, waiting silently...
And by the light of the moon, in her full bloom
Waiting, assiduously...
Hollering like a banshee, in mine misery!
A Siren singing delusionally!!
Calling for her lover, to come to she...
Demented she'll always be;
He cares not if she'll be singing, or not
Her loves lost, as he sails her by
Like Sirens singing in the moonlight
Am I!! 
Te Extrano!!

A Tiny Acorn ----

             A Tiny Acorn

Evolving in the extremities, of my mind
A tiny acorn...
Taking root, my words my thoughts
Into a sapling evolving, from a tiny seed
Reaching into the depths of my mind
Evoking a passion sublime!!
From the very core of me...
A tree, from a tiny acorn, evolving
Magnificently...
Interconnecting, our minds
Jumbled up in a fog, my thoughts...
Troublesome my thoughts my, words will be
Not easy to define, in the recesses
Once it's taken root...
Capricious my words won't be
Exuding from the depths,
Echoing within me, my words!!
Grow up!
Won't you, your not a child,
speaking the truth!!...
Why upset the apple cart, must you!
Fighting, my mind...
To speak not the truthed!
A pain in the ass, I must be!
Refusing to embroider my, words carefully
F..k them! am tired of those curtailing me,
My words, but my words are me!
All my life, I've been instructed, don't say this that
or the other...
But as an adult now, I'll say what the hell I please
Why would he give me a brain
If I'm not allowed to use it!!
Why mustn't I cast my, words to the winds
Carrying me far and wide...
My thoughts and me!
Extolling from the depths,  my soul
In the extremities of me!
How does one, control one's thoughts
An, art I've learned not...
Filtering my words, impossible!
From that tiny acorn, growing uncontrollably
In the very recesses, of me...
My words are just me,
Infamy!
Extending my, arms just like that, acorn tree
Far and wide, taking hold of me...
But my words I must extol not
It seems it's not seemingly...
They must hear not my, mind my thoughts, of he!!
From that little acorn, so troublesome to me
To all and sundry, I must extol not verses...
But I want to shout, from the top of my world
From that mountain high!
Down the valleys, to the savannah's wide
Caressing me, in the western winds,
my words
Beyond my universe and me!!

Let Me Live My Way

Let Me Live My Way 

Got up this morning, showered washed 

Blow dried my hair...

Smelling good looking good, even if I say so

myself... 

Know what do I do with my time!!    

Housework, I abhor 

Washing cleaning ironing, what a drag 

My minds screaming, let me out!

Let me live my way...

The way I feel the way I want

OMG!! 

My brains, gone awol I cannot think! 

But if my brain think cannot 

What will become of me!

My world I need, 

To keep me sane keep me safe 

Keeping me from combusting, exploding like

a volcano... 

This is the first day, of all my days to come

Every day encircling me, my world and me   

Every hour every minute every second! 

I fear it's gone...

Much needed stimulation, my mind 

Every day of my life, the little things I do

Struggling every moment, trying to be true 

Taking the piss not...

Am my own person, right? 

I too have want's, wishes desires   

My uncontrollable mind, 

Control cannot, those desires 

Knowing not if to quit or not...

Aberrations!! 

I can see controlling me,

But controlled, I won't be never have been 

nor will ever be...

Am me!!       

The only one controlling my future, you see

Be it right or not for me...

With my time somewhat, I must do

Knuckle down and get on with my editing

Otherwise, run with me, my mind!! 

Not a good thing no, no Siree! 

Have a good day my world...
You, you and me!!   

Yory!

     

I have no feelings for you except, as a friend
Yes, I do care for you but romantic feelings, no!
Please be straight with me, what made you think so
Have I given you cause to believe that I do?
I do love my friends all of them, but not romantically
That's all I've got left, my friends...
Not a huge amount just a few I can talk to
Once you told me with all the thousands of peoples
On your list, you talk with just a few...
Same here I've no hoards of people, just a few...
For I don't need that many. they're not real friends really!!
Am forever deleting those applying for friendship...
I don't need that kind of friendship...Corrupted!
But am sorry if I gave you a reason, to think otherwise
Or perhaps it's the way I write.......................
You know it's much easier to write fiction than reality...
It's true you know!!
I have been using you as my muse
Do you object terribly me doing so...
I've asked this same question some time ago
Yory! It upsets me you're thinking so low of me
I know not what to say, except you're distancing yourself from me!
Why I'd like to know!
Yory! I've not much experience with men as such
One man Yory one man I've had...
Wish I had been a tart like a lot of them out there!!
You may believe it not, but it's the God's truth
That's why I need you as my muse to write...
You know writers often have these muses,
Does it sound offensive to you?
& what I write is make-believe, that's what I do!
Without my muse, I cannot pour all these bent up feelings
That goes through me, is this wrong?
You've made me feel as if I've done something unsavoury
& why put all the onus on me!!
This last one I wrote your phrases,
That's just fiction, Yory!! all of it, not real!
Everything I write is fiction, make-believe!
Except for the ones I write about my family sending me to hell & back...
Now it seems am losing my friend, cause am using my imagination
Most people seem to think that what I write is real!!
If they only, knew that I've only had, one man in my lifetime...
Am not a maneater Yory!!! wish I was!
Am damned if I do & damned if I don't
Ok, Yory...Walk away, you don't have to be my friend,
or even like what I do
It's obvious that you don't...
By the way, in all the things you've told me,
have I ever given you reason, not to trust me!
Let me know if I let the side down...
Take care have, a great life...
& pull that plug on me if you must...
Balls in your court...Ciao Connie...
I know you hate, all this writing, this will be the last time
Shan't bother you again...       

Fires Still Burning

Fires Still Burning

Darling!!
The fire's burning still in my blood
that look in your eyes
Burning incandescently through me!
What a marvellous creature,
As I get up and brush my hair
Fires still burning within you!
Change you have not...
And I laugh gazing at, he.
The decaying of me he does, not see
Your still that girl I first saw in that far away land
Your shy smile, just as your smiling now...
Just like a flower an exotic flower waiting to be picked
A bird of paradise in the sunshine...
I fell for you there and then...
Now, looking at you you've lost not, that elegance
I saw in you, it's still there as you brush your hair
His eyes following me every which way I moved...
That proud look in your eyes!
The fires still burning in his minds, eyes
as he pulls me on to he...
I see not, this mesmerisation he has of me
Has been there from the start...
Yet I thought you mad, this obsession this hold on me.
But love resided, in mine heart fluttering butterflies,
We had eyes for no other...
Coming back time after time
To my island in the sun
Making love with your eyes...
Your camera lens spoke volumes in my face...
Wrapping me on that staircase
Every angle of me you've recorded whispering
Devine!
And you haven't lost that look in your eyes
Fires burning all the while...
As you made love with, your eyes.
I feel your eyes burrowing into me as I move
from A to B...
Yet at times I've doubted in my mind
This love has lasted such a long time.
For I had eyes not, for any other.
Spoiling my chances of, some other love
But the fires were burning, wild within me
There was no chance, for any other love
Yet they won't let me be, chasing me...
Silly fools go away let pass
For, I have eyes for no other, but he!
Even today they do stare, even at my sale by date...
It's not as if I were a beauty, you see
Thinking bloody fools, making my life miserable
But there are times in my minds, mind
I seem to think I need much, more than I need
Having, experienced no other, was I missing something!
Would love alone suffice, making me see
That I need no other but he!
A bed of roses has been not at, all times
For I have a mind of my own
Clashing at times breathing fire, like a dragon...
The devilishness in me!
Calming down he seemed to think...
That love has won somehow...
Yet I see others looking through me
Am I missing, something, unfaithful I've never been
Except at times in my mind, wanting more than I need
For the fires are burning inexorably...
Burning in his eyes,  that elusive look
Simmering embers, O'my!!
Your the Stellar in my eyes as he reaches me
As we make love, intrinsically.
The ecstasy running through me my body
As in a vice, he takes me
At that moment in time escape, I want not
Consuming the fires my mind...
As he whispers yet again you've changed, not a bit
But the decaying of me he seems not to see
A tear flowing silently from mine eyes
With such intensity loving me...
Even my tears extinguish cannot the fire,s between us
As he eloquently brushes from mine eyes
I cry out in the delirium of love
Embers burning his eyes
The fires still burning!
In our eyes!

Other Side Of Midnight

Other Side Of Midnight

May I borrow your whispers
From the other side of midnight
When we're alone together,
no one else in sight...
I'd whisper in the morning
And I'll whisper in the moonlight
And I'll whisper softly in your ear
As I say goodnight...
Darling, could we, should we!
Smilingly looking at me, why not!!
So beneath those palm trees
We'd whisper through the night
You were leaving in the morning
leaving me,
To sit think and write words, of yesterday
That at the time seemed alright
The happiness we shared,
Forgetting not those little pains
In a blink, of an eye happiness dies
Ambiguity in my mind,
Recollecting, a tomorrow that'll never come
When all forgotten
I've entertained happiness
But there are, still those little pains 
And on the darkness of mine nights
I'd whisper to the moon, in her full bloom
Words half-uttered between us
Love's love borrowed or otherwise
Touching in the night
Sending shivers down my spine
Many, many words between us
Reminding us
That on the other side of midnight
Love existed in our hearts 
Regret our words, why should I
Like a opium to my mind
Cannot disguise the wonder between us
For you're all I need, you do realise
For as I kiss your lips your eyes
And the hunger in between the sighs
Once in our lives
Love liveth within us!! 

There's A Cavern In MY Soul =====

There's a cavern in my soul
Awaiting to swallow me
It's as deep as my oceans
Cracking up I think I'll be
Much too emotional it hurts
Within me...
It's an impossibility
When I cannot see thee
Much too far
It's well beyond me
But I try I really try, to care not
If he goes or stays
But in my heart of hearts
I won't let it be
Echoing through my mind
Reason's telling me, let it be
But how can I let it be
For I adore, he!
Day and night on my mind he'll be
And in the darkness of my nights,
when sleep eludes me
Wanting he hugging me
He's the reason I breathe sleep eat
And drink the essence of he
In my dreams, he'll be...
The Absurdity!
In how I live the days of my days
On my mind, intrinsically he'll be...
But there's this cavern waiting for me
To trip and swallow me
Logically it won't be   
Fall I must not for he...
Too late, oh dear lord too late it'll be
For his embedded within me!!

Just One Day...

Just One Day

Just one day in my life, just one day
I'd love to be loved, like no other
In any other way.
Someone there for me, love me
unconditionally

No matter not what I do or say...

Someone to hold me tight, even if I
push you away...

Hold me grounded in every way  

To share my love my life even in spite
of my ways... 

The ambiguity in, what I'll say 

As I'm spewing out when am hurt 

When you walk away...

Without a word, in any way   

The silence's a killer, every day 

Screaming why you care, not

I don't know, you wouldn't say...

Yesterday! 

So many, many yesterdays 

You'd take me by the hand and say 

You are my love my life, the Stellar in my skies 

You've sparkling diamonds in your, eyes 

Filling my heart, when you laugh

In, an inexplicable way...   

Why do I love you, in this way

This obsessive obsession in every way...   

A body that'll think not in any, way 

Reasoning not...

You cannot reason in any way! 

An uncoordinated, mind stubbornly they'll say 

To love you not in any way...

Conspiring with others, my love you'll say 

Je t'aime...

In my ambiguity, I look away
But who's to say
I must love you not in any way!! 

Extinguishable my love is not, in any way! 

My heart's weeping every day of my days     

In a world, we live I understand not in any way 

With, those that care's not, they'll say

Love him not in any way...  

The obtuseness, sometimes in me
When I extol my love uncontrollably
It's there for everyone to see,
When it comes to you, in every way
They'll say just let it be, let it be!
The constriction, in my heart, is such
Departing from me, without a say
Ominously,
I'll think you love me not, in any way...
Yesterday, why must I think of yesterday's
We'd sing and dance at every chance
And made love in every way...
Now the stormy winds took all away
And we've left ambiguous in what to think what to say...
And a brain refusing to say, no more
Je t'aime, Je t'aime...  

       

He Gives Me Shivers

Each time I look at, he!!
He gives me shivers
nonchalantly, looking at me
That stare penetrating through me
Looking at me, forbiddingly
But underneath his skin, he's on fire
His fibrillating heart...
Pumping through his veins, his blood
As I nudge up to him,
With fever in mine, eyes!
I tried to walk away
Was as miserable, as sin...
As I see, he standing before me
A thought came to mind,
where did he spring from!
A mystery to me!
I saw him not approaching!!
There stood he looking at me...
That look, I was a fragmenting
I felt the floodgates open,
Silently, my heart was weeping,
Damn him!
For he still gives me shivers...
I looked upon his visage, inside I cry
The pull's sot strong, The attraction
like a magnetic field
Hating myself, for falling yet again
Leaving me bewildered...
It's killing me,
every time my eyes set upon, he!
And all over again, giving me shivers!
As I kiss every inch of, he!
His touch setting fire my blood,
Exhilaration...
Losing my mind my reason...
Reasoning, cannot as into my cocoon
Snuggling up to me
Marvellous creature!!
It takes every once of me,
not to fall for, he, all over again!
Oh dear lord, why!!
Has he this effect on me!
His eyes the colour, of my skies
Escaping, he, I cannot be...
Yah!!
He gives me shivers!!

   Connie James

You Made Me Feel

As you go swimming,
I lie down to take the sun
As a summer sun-kissed breeze  

Whispering over me...
It felt so good, I saw you in my mind
Who else could it be, hovering over me!  

Your sun-kissed lips...
Those featherlight touches
Depositing upon me...
In dreamland was I as the kissing started
Looking at you with wonder in mine, eyes
It was no surprise, as I clung on to you
As if a tomorrow there wouldn't be
Insistently begging, make love to me!
Kissing your lips your eyes
The hunger from within the sighs!!
I've been starved of love such a long time
Until you, with your phrases of love
Your verses of poetry
Filling my mind, my heart
With feelings, I knew not existed
Feelings that hurt feelings,
Causing havoc in my life... 
That until then seemed okay, ignorance's bliss
The tears, the silent tears flowing as I sit hurting
Waiting for the hurt to dissipate, till then misery...
At times transcending into a mire of lust
Inexplicably sluttish, till then existed not
So green was I!
But your words penetrating my mind
Becoming unsatisfied, with life as I knew it...
You made me feel with my mind my heart
As the whispering began, I became this thing
With you perpetually on my mind...
What chance had I as you gazed at me,
that stare!
Beguiling, hypnotising me
And I pretend not to see...
The obsession, this obsessiveness
Waiting for your words obsessively
In my mind, I didn't have peace of mind
Oh, what was I to do, as I lie in the sun
In the summer cool breeze,
whispering over me
You made me feel,
Extraordinary...     

Flying Sparks!

Revibrating, through me my brain,
My body...
Euphorically, the ecstasy
Every moment I'm with you...
Igniting sparks, between us
oh, ecstasy!
There's this something about you
Gazing from across the room
You're so intent on, she!
To every word, listening as if the gospel,

If it were a profanity!
The excitement in her eyes, it's there to see
Laughing with her casting, glances at me
Just a game you're playing,
Intolerable to me!
Making me feel less than real...
But I too can play games don't, you see
Up and down gazing striping, he
A flush comes to my face, as I imagine he,
Kissing me...
And my hands whispering all over, he!
He's hot,  his voice embers, burning incandescently
As I imagine he, pretending he'll be you
Caressing his face, glancing your way
Tweaking his nose, kissing he!!
Caring not, whether you'll see me!
Why do you do this to me?
Feeling a warmth erupting through me
Looking at you...
There's this thing about you!
Understand I do not, this primitiveness in me
Looking into your eyes,
Sparks flying, between you and I
Dumfounded I'll be if I understand me!
This ache following me, it hurts don't you see
Slowly killing me!!
And from the very depths of me
tears flowing silently!!
Torrents waterfalls, exuding from within me
Wonder why would it be!
Kiss me, darling,
Like, yesterday...
When on my portals, you came to be
Like a tornado, devouring me...
Butterfly's fluttering within me, as I raise
My eyes to thee!!
Dear Lord your gaze penetrating me, f...kd up I'll be
As you kissed me I knew not the ramifications for me
Cared I'd not, this hunger euphorically...
The colour of my skies, looking into your eyes
I see the wonder of thee, has never left me!
Confounded I'll be why...
Would I feel, I need more than I need
Spying he making, eyes at she!
Fragmenting my heart, irrevocably...
Yet I know you're only, getting to me
Seeing, sparks exiting your eyes,
Penetrating me!
There's something about thee
Bewitching confounding me!
Across the water, gazing at me
My soul mate, would he be!
I love playing mind games, intrinsically
A little badness there'll be in me
Playing games with he!
Making me feel that am living
That am real!!