Saturday 28 March 2015

Good Morning World

Good Morning, World..

December 1st Today 

December 1st today...As I look out of my window 
It's a grey, grey day my soul can cope not with grey days of my day's 
My heart's crying out, please set me free 
From this ache in my heart. 
Peace I have not my spirits gone down south.
Dragging me down..as tears spilling out in the grey days of my life
Feeding the roots of the love that once, were in my heart
Now only ache lives there as I look outside my world's grey, grey..
Must pull my socks up, pack it in I must
Even if my soul drags me or not, the sad route within
I must pack it in, put some music on my deck
Vivaldi might ..then maybe Beethoven or Tchaikovsky.
They always lift my spirits
Have a good day my world as I try to extract myself
From the sadness, I carry within.
But those that are my friends, have a great day..
Pay attention not, its a way to release the weight upon my soul..


                                  By Connie James.









Monday 23 March 2015

Pure Poetry.

Before my eyes, those shadows are melting away
Yet it takes no time at all before those shadows within
Impregnating me those shadows in the eyes of my mind was he.
Those eyes so blue his lips so true like a waterfall implicitly running through
The darkness of his skin is something to behold, he standing there, his skin like gold
Scintillating by the riverside whilst I sit there waiting for he
As I walk by the riverside his feet kicking the sands rustling through
With something on his mind kicking the sands through and fro
At times kicking the boat at anchor kicking sands over, his minds in turmoil
He's much more than a stranger I've seen him before
He must be a man of means its written in his stance in his stare.
The way he holds his head at an angle as he looks at me
He must be from here about's certainly.
The elusiveness in he..He looks very much alone
It's written on his face his smile as he looks beyond without pretensions
Like a roaming spirit, he is so handsome as only he can be
As I sit by the banks of the Yamuna I know he's only a human being
But to me he's my world implicitly, this place in time
As he walks on slowly I follow on from the distance
Amongst the branches I can hear the song of a nightingale
I stand there listening enchanted as it retreats beyond the trees
The splashing on the river banks as he treading water refreshingly
He walked on stopping amongst the trees now and again mopping a tear away
In the vicinity of the Taj stopping..and me stopping to.
I can feel his shadow as he stands beside me I can see the quiver of his lips
He was weeping ..I standing looking at he then lifting my hand
Touching him suddenly the sadness in his eyes was there to see
At that moment could help not but love him unconditionally
In his love, for pure poetry.
        

Piano Pianissimo.




The indelible scent of the night as lovers speak
Their minds can think not, as they leap from darkness,
into the light, unable to sleep ..
The obstructive silences between you and I,
As I hunger for a look for a smile,
for I am smiling for you, my love.
With the words, I try to reach you,
To touch to feel to wipe my tears
I watched the moonlit light, lighting your face as you sleep..
Tentatively I kiss your eyes your lips    
You smile in your dream as you sleep
As I kiss your fingertips you open your eyes
I halt a second or two, looking at you mesmerised
The broken words meaning nothing between you and I
As I look into your eyes, I can see not the lightness within
And like strangers drifting by the lighthouse,
As we shelter from the wind..
The primitiveness the look between you and me.
As our feet kiss those petals where we lay..
We speak of love, when lightning strikes our world
We don't need meaningless words of love,
for we have our eyes our breath our touch,
Piano pianissimo.



















































Sunday 22 March 2015

Unforgetable.

   


The shadows across your face..
I should have chased away..I should.
But like an obstinate stranger immersing from the rain
Soaked through to when we could contain not,
The primitive feelings within truly unbelievably so.
With the gusting of the wind the rain without refrain,
I stand there taking root as I call your name..
Memories intact when I was younger, much younger than now
Before my eye's I realise imaginings so pure. so pure in my mind.
As a poet in his own world, head in the in clouds going on about mesmerised..
Pictures before his eyes, real or imagery..I know not.
The pictures he paints he paints in his mind, the dark the light the love
Painting the laughter the love the night, when the euphoria takes hold
Of all his imaginings, and uncontrollable in his mind, certainly.
The smell of the page's, as he writes his verses his phrases of love.
The long road I walk alone, my thoughts in disarray..
There are shadows as I speak phantoms everywhere..
Is it you or not, real or imaginary,
Whispering in the darkness of night, my phantom and I
Am wondering why at, the other side of midnight finding myself reliving my day's my life..
Whether he cares or not,
In my troubled mind casting asunder, torn between me the man living his poetry
Dragging reliving whether he cared or not
In his blood, deep in his mind his crowded mind,
He can sleep not, his mind his verses his words his phrases awaiting the moment,
Within his soul reaching deeply within..
Creating poetry upon poetry
Searchingly unaware that he in his dilemma,
Could find not where home should be
Truly lonesome me on my own without you..Sadness within
But wherever you go your shadow I've crossed in semi-awareness semi-sleeplessness.
I can only speak my verses from me to you..
Unforgettable..That kiss.
When we're alone.                            



























             






























Thursday 19 March 2015

I've Created You

In my mind, I've created you
In all my imaginings, I created you with love with kindness in your heart 
I created you as if you've tasted love,
For I have not tasted love know not the meaning.. 
But my love which is great and  pure. 
In between the clandestine meetings the rooms I made ready for you 
And with my memories intact  
The memories of you deeply in my mind my very being, 
In creating you I touched moulded you whispered softly your name, 
So you wouldn't refrain forgetting your name, the name that I gave you..
Oak is the name, so you'll grow strong, like an Oak tree..
In my creating of you, I convalescence in the harshness of creating you..
Just to lose you, my love, just to lose you !! 
Walking through the isles of those great Cathedrals, wide like avenues, 
It's a place I like not those cathedrals of a God I know not, I do not feel at home, there. 
Can not go in the sunlight without the shades on. 
Have a weakness in the sunlight,  the sun the glare.
As I think of you, our relationship controlling,
But I like not when you intervening in my life, I like not.
The distances between us so long and far apart, 
So I just close my eyes and imagine the distance's not so great. 
As I write my pages new words is a must, 
With the zeal, those streets the buildings of bricks, 
The church bells pealing, How I love that sound. 
In your absence, I can see you, can see you so clearly, 
Peace of mind, I have not relating to you.. 
The greatest presence in you is when I see you coming with that proud walk, 
Your stance I recognise anywhere, as you come and go reciting your Hemingway.
As I seat by myself I can see your sun kissed lips, 
I can not refrain myself, as I look at your lips.. imagining your sun kissed lips, 
How can I refrain !! making me love you, 
Ahh, making love without restraints,
Tonight I've created you in my imaginings, 
I whisper softly, my mind can contain not my whisperings. 
But forsake, you I'll want not.    











Tuesday 17 March 2015

Kaleidoscope Of Colours.

The Kaleidoscope of colours high up in my skies
The purples the reds the gold's and the bronzes there are many
It's enough to fill one's senses as one rotates around,
My world spinning in, its axis as it turns from the sun
The little birds in our world preparing for the night, 
In their canopy high above..as they flock in.
One more morsel, one more bite before the night draws in
the darkness in sight, singing an evening song at dusk
They sang acapella the little birds of our world
As they settled for the night the chorus like a dream
The scent of the flowers as dusk descends, in our world
The scent of the jasmine so heady.Filling one's senses
The red rose that scent so heavenly
It was given to you with love a gift to you from me.
The colours the various colours from reds to deep bloods
Variegated on the petals like these, there aren't many about
A gallant young man scattered those petals, as I was stepping out.
He stood there watching as I picked that red rose
I uttered this is from the girl to the poet, with love
Sitting there all alone looking staring at the world
With my coffee sipping distractingly
I found him so mesmerising as he was looking at me
I got my notebook and starting writing I think that's he
The one I've searched for through the floods through the rains
Through the shining of my days, through the darkness of my nights
Looking into his eyes whispering endearments of love
That's when my words begun
Where have you been my love I've searched high and low
You were nowhere to be found..
Until now.
                          Connie James 
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My Pride.

Those things I left with you, like my mind my heart
And every little thing that you know.."My pride".
My pride I have none when it comes down to you
The fallen leaves the sands and the dunes, up and down.
Whilst in my little cottage, I sit waiting for you
But where are you, my lovely I can not see you.
You know, you know am waiting for you
Have been since noon..
With the scent from the streets, you come running to me
Where you've been all along
Meanwhile, I sit waiting for you
Whilst you go, foraging under the streets lights
The bells the temple lights that you know, so well
Down the lanes unknown faces smiling at you
And that stranger that stops and lingers, shadowing me
The wondrous seas waiting for us, don't you see
But you my darling must bring the city lights with you.
The city, that you won't leave behind
Where we have a history, there.
Where it can still hear our whispers our, sigh's
As you recall the house at the end of the street
The sacrifices the pain and everything in between
I know you're that poet, with love in your heart
And I am that girl, that left those things behind.
I know you wouldn't, get to my seaside town
Until the moon's high in the sky gossamer, like shedding its light
I see you're shadow coming down the street
I knew you'd come, I hoped you'd come with the shining moon
The boatman repairing, its nets, by the silvery moon
Those little shanties hiding, behind the trees
The long rope bridge over water, not far to walk round  
But you carry with you the old city the old love
That's ingrained within, you're heart
Then the fallen leaves the shifting sands
The brightness of the glowing moon
With it you pick up the scent, of the woman.
That has patiently waiting for you
Within me, I have those touches
Those secret touches, that you and I share
Those silent tears, one regrets to say
Never so far away.          






       

Monday 16 March 2015

Coming In From The Storm



In From The Storm.

The night that awful, night the storm came unexpectedly
The winds howling screaming, howling like a banshee
As if the Earth this primitive earth had fallen, of its axis.
The urgent knocking on the door,
Surprised that anyone would be out there in the eye of the storm.
Opening the door, I was faced with he standing before me
With the flash lightning behind he
It amplified the contour's of his face his eyes
He was soaked through.
Between the darkness and the lightning seeking shelter from the storm
I asked him in. Curiously I stood before he
Handing him a towel.
Thanks. Said he.rather crossly,
For allowing himself to lose his way, saying.
I've lost my way I could see not, the winds so strong
The rain lashing the lightning electrifying I knew not where I was
I saw your blue lantern twinkling so coming away from the storm
Hellishly it is out there.
I could not get a word in edgeways
It's okay said I, you're welcome.
A stranger coming in from the storm
Using the towel, I handed drying himself off
Standing by the window was he
The lantern lighting his face
I could see him in semi-darkness
How beautiful he was!
My eyes would release not his stare for he was staring at me
His hair longish rather wild curling about his eyes
Making him much more desirable
He's grey eyes staring
Wanted so much to touch his face thus, just a caress on his cheek
The storm affected him more than he let on
Standing by the window in half light
He looked like a sculpture, like David in the Roman days
A real Renaissance, of a man! I'd love to keep him.
A living human sculpture, he belongs here, with me
I can smell the scent of he, a distance of a few feet
Heightening my senses
I'd love to run my fingers through his hair
Feel his face his eyes his lips that's curved just so
He's the man I've created in my mind
The man I've sketched a real Matisse
Every line every sinew in his body
I've asked him to sit down
Not that I wanted him to
I'd rather admire his torso, so beautiful.
Living me in turmoil
The visions before my eyes,
He smouldering,
That look sending shivers through me.
Where,  indeed not in extremis.
Slowly I walked up to him that touch, that caress
As I softly touched his cheek.
And the tears in my eyes as I slowly kissed his eyes
Could believe not my actions,
And by the light the blue lantern, I kissed his lips slowly
Placing my hands thus, either side of his face
Could believe not, he came in from the storm
With bated breath, uttering let me behold you!
My words unashamedly
Before the rain,
Before the storm came in.

                                 By Connie James.






Sunday 15 March 2015

When We Made Poetry


Underneath the station lights, I saw you last night beneath the dark sky
I stopping  you so I could glance at you, not from afar. 
Mesmerised by you looking into your eyes before you passed by  
Can endure not, when you pass without a word a phrase uttered 
So difficult to entertain so hard to frame into words 
Like a phrase from a stranger, much easier to obtain 
I saw you up at the fort in the alleyway 
Between the leaves and the fog, you slowly walked to me 
Through that magnificent grand door 
Shivering looking at me so cold you were 
In that cold winter day, with the darkness seeping through 
The evening sun setting casting shadows on you 
You looked like as I've never seen you before 
So dapper so debonair. 
And I looking for a reason to get closer to you 
But a reason I needed not any excuse would do 
Just to touch you in the silence of the night 
The words came out to play
But tonight I held my hand cupping your head 
Standing close as we began to dance moving slowly
Those intricated steps the new craze, all around 
I held you tight as we shimmered to and fro 
And as the music takes hold our minds in a fog 
As we danced and danced on air, so light you were 
Our steps our minds so attuned to the music.
No time to whisper to say after such a long time together 
We're drifting away, the memories of what I never said 
Nor will say, giving me not a chance to say
Please, stay. 
Towards the river, we'd walk like, many times before 
We'd spend the night, by the lantern light 
The fort not so far away 
Just sit beside me. 
So I can see your face, inhale the scent of you 
Touch you again and again, for when you're away from me 
I shall exist not completely, nor happily without you 
In the night of my nights, when we were fancy, free 
There will never be such a night 
That night when we made poetry.             






                

Friday 13 March 2015

To Love To Live

Those words born within me as I sit and write
By the twilight of a night, just before darkness sets in
In the beautiful twilight memorable light
As in a dream Pablo Neruda's verses, of poems
Under my skin at times, I know not why
I fill in a streak of light my thoughts within
My mind could think not my ideas were draining
The noise impossible to retain the memories lost, lost.
In the open pages, I write what's in my heart
Those that were of my blood like Papa, those that I loved
Once more all by myself writing the words breaking my heart
When I! So alone, could bear not, finding myself lonesome as can be.
By myself so hard so very hard I miss Papa
I know his roots still growing deeply within me.
In the dusty road, I walk forgotten by all
Through the evening road so wet with my thoughts
And am filled with the chorus of the streets
The red flowers of spring
Blossoming young girls so happy
Meanwhile finding myself, not an easy task you see
Where I am where I should be
In a dream's dream know not the answer exactly
But I dream he's waiting for me.
Someone's staring at me as I stand high up on the verandah
Know not who the stranger may be
He's asking me where are you my love!
Am here you know, have always been
How far?
Nearby I'd say.
It's, on the road?
The road could be anywhere near or far
By the bridge way, there's always a bridge over a river.
And the woman that's standing alone as you pass by
There is always she!
It's not so easy thinking of her
Reading you through her!
Am so alone it hurts must admit
Admitting my loneliness painfully
On my way, I must be, writing my words
Wishing you happy birthday my love
With the first rain drops
In my mind, I thought whispering Papa!
Going into my rooms
I was born again
With the words of a poet
To hope to love to live.

                   Connie James.










  

The Warmth Of A Womb



Whispering on the empty streets I stand feeling like a Queen
On the old dusty streets of my city as the midnight toll's away
Quite forgotten anything that reminded me of home
The place where once there was love
There was music there was laughter ever after there
Like coming into the warmth of a womb
Hugging me close so close
And the love forgotten the expatriate has returned once more
With the tears silently flowing  reaching that home,
Where once there was love, now an emptiness within us.
I've been away so long, as I look upon, the old homestead
That once was home to us
The strangeness the lamps on the streets
As I look at the silhouette of you
Standing there strangely looking at me
In the air the night winds flow
As I remember each touch forgotten not
The looks of love the leaves fallen carpet like
The garaged rickshaw
Standing phantom, like with unbelievable eyes
The native returning once more
Settling down to sleep on a calm, calm city
Peace reigns upon
With each breath, I take each word I speak each look I took
As I look upon my city lovingly my city my love
Whispering back at me strangely
Going forwards backwards and back again
But with the wounds still fresh in one's mind
With the nakedness of a body, with clothes not
My city will see me know me or not
My whispers it will hear softly
Whispering listening
In the darkness of the night
As it sets deeply, closer so close around me
My city uttering, I stand in pain
My sky's above the touch of love
In the night,
Whispering as we love
The sigh's of the night

 
 


       

The Scent Of You.




The scent of you remaining amongst the pages of old
The scent that only you can hold, a lifetime ago
As you touch those pages in every pour ingrained the fragrance of you
Dispersed not but ingrained in every little sense still retains the essence that's you
The rain, that night was such the freshness in the air
Like an opened book, it's like that first time that tonight
Leading through like, a door opened that first time
And you standing there, that look in your eyes was not surprised
As the rain softly falls upon my palms little by little
Closing my eyes, you stood there but in the eyes of my mind
At the bus stop remembering that's where we met that time
Long ago, standing quite alone that night
Soaked, your eyes your hair dripping
Standing in the evening shower so wet so alone
Towards you I walked slowly standing beside you
As the crowded buses stop not
I took your hands in mine you smiled as shiver went through you
Wet so wet were you, The evening of rain
You looked in silence and said once again the evening of rain,
Like music, to my ears beautifully phrased
Haven't heard the same phraseology since
Again & eloquently phrased, by you
From that moment on there was no question of me not loving you
Even sharing your umbrella with me
Such an unexplainable feeling of love, romance
Standing in the rain my arm about you
I was blowing cold so cold, it was blowing a gale
With the lightening from high above
Touching the ground below
As fork lightening splits a tree in two
I took hold of your hand in a vicious grip
Lightning makes me shake nervously it excites me
making me feel alive like that lightening across the sky's
Then falling down to earth.
But to your hands I held tightly wanting not to let go
As the bus arrived sending you on your way
Waving through the howling winds wet, through
Once more on the road
I find myself writing those pages that'll bring you to me
Scented those pages that once you touched
Whilst I was kissing you.            

                            Connie James.





   
 

Before Darkness Sets In



I sit here in a reverie, thinking about he.
My pen refuses to move from my first word,
I sit here pondering about he..
In my mind's eye, I can see he as he passes me,
I pretend not to see that shadow of he..
The beauty of his body in silhouette am mesmerised by he..
The arrogance in his walk I can not believe he's prancing before me..
My eyes follow he as I stretch to touch,
But somehow he avoids me with a grin he's, face is a picture to see..
The words of love of old,
That'll never be told,
But I so long to tell him what's in my heart..
But my mind refuses to utter not those words of love, that's deeply within me..
On the bench, I clear a space as he passes again,
I scatter the yellow the red petals with the heavenly scent.
But he cares not even as he sees me playing a game with he..
His shadow hovering over me, my heart skipping a beat.
As he knocks on my window pane and I like a gambling fool
Go and see him standing there staring at me..
I whisper..Oh lord don't do this to me.
I pick my pen again the pain within me, as he cares not for me..
Tears flowing silently as I try to write something that amuses me..
In the candle light before darkness sets in,
Am I that woman happy before that candle light that I sit and write..
Before darkness sets in.

                           Connie James.