Feeling Blue

       By Connie James

Know not what's up with me
I guess feeling blue 
My soul's crying
feeling a weakness running through me 
Tiredness taking hold of me.

Behind my eyes, there's a waterfall cascading
oozing through me;
Without any help from me; 
A certain tightness in my throat my chest 
Suffocating me;
On top of my world, I should have been. 

Just arrived from my paradise island 
Where I was born;
The lands of my Papa that he tended with love.
The old homestead, looking so sad.
Where once there was laughter   
 Music and dance ever after, happiness abounded.

Now it's a place a sad place, dead;  
Irrevocably dead.
No sign of life in those that reside there
Might as well have been zombies automatons 
But there again they had lost their other halves
Happiness has left the building, regrettably. 

The lands I ran around as a child 
Climbing the fruit trees my brother and me
Chasing the livestock a couple of ragamuffins,
In bare feet, ahh, Mama would dispair.

Now, not much land to speak of but, what's left 
It's lying fallow a wasted land where once crops would grow
So sad, no pride anywhere...
The soul of the homestead has died;
Lands that Papa tended tirelessly, 
Our little paradise in the days of old... 
As you walk in desolation greets one's eyes.

The gardens that once was the envy of many; 
Now, bothered they won't be;
Lying fallow, dead grass trees unkempt.
Red dust that once a fertile land used to be.
The untidiness permeates everywhere. 
The summer house now a dumping ground. 
Where once had pride and place.

The flowers, orchids that resided there 
It was a place where one could sit and relax. 
Afternoon teas, little cakes galore.
Even with us rumbustious kids, laughter abounded.

Awfully sad seeing the devastation taking hold.
No one cares or sees, the desolation blind, they must be! 
The pride has gone from a home that once lived loved. 
Sang and danced at every chance
In papa's days.
Now their not living, merely existing, waiting for god. 
Just waiting to die;  
As the brightest star vacated her world 
Taking laughter with her...

I believe I know now why I feel so blue. 
Once upon a time, our home was a happy place to be
But I live not there, others taking control. 
Or not. Waterfalls still flowing 
There's an ache within me.
Tiredness! I know not!!