Saturday Breakfast .

Sitting here all alone, everyone's gone
It's so peaceful, that I think I might write
But yet here I sit, waiting for what.

My inspiration's gone AWOL, it's gone on strike.

I got up made breakfast, for the old boy and me.

A glass of freshly squeezed orange juice,

Just to wake us up with a zing, 

He likes a boiled egg on Saturday's with one soldier, not three.
 

I myself like a sailor,  but I like more than one,

As one wouldn't be enough, to dip into my lovely, soft boiled egg

I like fresh, brewed coffee, he likes a cup of tea

Then he likes some croissants with some honey, you see.

I like a lovely piece of toast, not soggy, hate soggy toast, don't you know

With home, made marmalade, with Seville oranges you see, 

There's nothing like it don't you agree.

Then I go and shower whilst the boy does the dishes

Then I hang the washing out, it looks like a Chinese laundry.
I 've got three long lines and there all full you see,
It's a good job it's a nice day to dry it in the breeze.

I thought the old brain gone on strike, but it seems it's coming alive.

And am not so sure I like what's coming out of my mouth
Oh no, now I 've got all the blooming ironing,

And I hate that with a vengeance, don't you know 

I 'll just have to get Tchaikovsky out to help me, not to get so bored.

And as I iron, he plays the most amazing music.

In my mind am, dancing, the swan lake's waltz  

Floating on cloud nine. As I come down to earth,

We look at the other and wink, Saying isn't life a bitch.

                                                                                                                                                                                         BY CONNIE JAMES

Dancing With My Iron.

Today somehow can't get my favourite music out of my head
Had rather a long stretch, morning of ironing,
But can't do anything like that, without my favourite composers
Don't know how I got it done...but I did every single piece of it 

So I started with Beethoven  and finished with Tchaikovsky
With the dulcet tones of Beethoven, such sweet melodious sounds 

But just couldn't get my teeth into it needed something to get my blood going 

Except for the fifth Symphony, wow that was a powerful sound. 

Send ripples through my body making my blood curl.  

So Tchaikovsky found its way, on to my music deck   

And from the first note, I was electrified, not literally you know

So I started with Swan Lake, immediately it fired my brain.

 As I ironed the old boys shirts, I was on cloud nine

I ironed on and on, in my mind, I was waltzing & swaying, 
To that beautiful sound the Swan Lakes music, by the time little, swans came in

I was dancing with my iron, that iron was gliding over those shirts,

Effortlessly I must say, on and on it went... ironed shirts sheets even nick nicks,

There was no stopping me,  by the time the Hungarian dance came in,

I was floating, floating on a cloud, each note was ecstasy each beat,

Like the beating of my heart, as I stopped and stood there conducting,

The Spanish dance came on, and so I danced and conducted in turn...

By now my blood was on fire, as I danced and danced with my iron...

And then the mazurka came in I was lost, lost in time ...

I had these crazy feelings running through me, must say tears spilling out...

The euphoria the manic euphoria inside of me,  as I danced on and on...

I smell burning...oh bugger...says I,  I burned the old boys shirt 
But what the hell it matters not, he's got plenty more

So I danced ironed and danced, my heart feels full by, the throbbing, throbbing

Sounds, that's going through me, as I remember Papa saying, darling feel

Just feel the music, as he was trying to teach me, now I think and say

I do Papa, I really do...it feels as if my heart bursting

With happiness to the majestic sounds of Tchaikovsky.

Tchaikovsky has always had, this effect on me.

                                         By Connie James.

Little Sis, Full of Laughter

What's on my mind not worth writing about,
I feel the old boy doesn't quite approve
me sitting here, in bed trying to write,
cause it was rather peaceful.

now its been broken, a sneering old boy
can't keep his trap shut, just let me be
my inspiration has gone AWOL
perhaps try another day.

I got a dickey foot, and I'll tell you what, that's no joke
went dining out with friends last night, all of a sudden
my foot gave up the ghost and I went down
I believe its the ligaments, as it's happened before

I was playing badminton, I heard it tear
it happens now and again, there's a weakness there
so I strapped really tight, so I can go here and there
tomorrow must see the quack, and see what he says

as my foot and legs so numb, don't like what's on my mind,
as I haven't strength on my foot, as it just flops about
so I 've got it well strapped, it seems to help, you see.
Can't get it out of mind, it's not helping me.

This morning saw the Doc, see what's happened
to the appointment, I should have had weeks ago
when I said my foot and leg was numb, he was surprised, you know
said I had dropped foot and arches, my mind is wondering...........

a few years ago, a much-beloved sister died...
of motor neurone disease, it started on, her feet
that numbness you see, she ended up in a wheelchair,
it was ghastly, sight, my wonderful little sister, cut down in her prime.

She was such a card, always so full of fun, her beauty, her wit
her mischievous laughter, so full of life, she was the light of our lives
Don't want to feel morbid, can't help it you see
in my mind I see my little sister, helpless as a baby...

Yet she fought so hard, to beat this thing you see
she went from Madeira to Portugal, and even to England
to see some specialist in Harley Street, she came over two or three times
but it wasn't any good, there was no magic wand for her.

In two thousand and six, I decided to go and see her
if I didn't go then it might have been too late
as I arrived, she'd be leaving in a few days, to see the quack in Harley street

one more time, but it didn't do any good.

We've spent a few days together, we even went about, a bit
the sadness in her eyes was such, but she still had hope.
 My beloved little sister was as helpless as a baby
couldn't do anything for herself, without the help of many.

Her wonderful daughter was an absolute Star
you should have seen, how she coped, it was an amazing sight
the easy she moved her mother, from wheelchair to shower chair.
and finally to bed, I tried to help, I didn't have the knack.

was terrified of dropping her on the floor instead
didn't realise how heavy, a paralysed person could be.
as my dear sister lay there, stark naked on her bed
she looked so beautiful and helpless as a baby.

As she lay on her bed, with her long beautiful hair
waiting to be dried, then I massaged her limbs
I thought she looks just like a mermaid, so helpless out of water
in her lovely long hair, I said you know, you look just like a mermaid!!!

Her answer just gets me mermaids tail  just get me some fins.
tears running down my face, not wanting her to see,
I turned my back and said, I would if I could Sis...you know I would if I could
she would swap her legs for a mermaid's tail

So she goes back to England to see that specialist
meanwhile there's me waiting, at the airport for her, she was arriving
from England, as I was leaving Madeira...we kissed and hugged
and chatted for a while, then the boy took one last photograph of her and me,

the boy being a photographer, was always on the job.
to make her smile, he said this one's going in Vogue.
as we hug and say our goodbyes in her eyes I saw hope had died
so she comes home, with a death sentence on her head

as we said our goodbyes, I tried to be so strong
but it was too much to say goodbye, to my beautiful little sister,
as I break down I hug her one more time, cross with myself for letting the side down.
whispering just go with God Sis.

As I got on that plane, with my breaking heart
the pain was so great...that I was howling inside.
The tightness on my chest , as I could not breath,
the constriction in my throat, as if I would explode,

brought a fist to my mouth to keep the sound down,
my own son saying try... and think of something else
couldn't wait for the drinks trolley to come over
this was no excuse, just needed a good brandy, to calm me down

After this she just gave up, I saw her in Feb, by June it was all over
June 13 two thousand & six sometime in the afternoon, we were warned,
to expect the expected, the end of her suffering, I took a photo of hers and lit a candle.

sat there meditating willing her to follow the light,

just follow the light sis, just follow the light sis, don't know how long I sat there.

after a while I new it was over, I cried for the sister that I'd never see again.

so yes I cried for my loss, for the light being extinguished much too soon,

as my beautiful sis was no more. Tiamo little Sis.                                        

                                                    

                                                     By Connie James.

Whispers In The Wind

In the vastness of our world, yet one feels so alone
But if I whisper long and slow will you hear me my love
Will you hear the whispers in the wind that whistling
That goes round & round that ghostly sound.

Don't you see that's me calling, calling you but you my love
Do not answer me.. there's a fire burning in my heart
And am waiting, waiting for you, my love to quench it
Yet I know, I know my love, that you do not share this need

This obsession that's driving me insane, can not eat or sleep my love.
I see you in the distance, you look so young, much too young
For me, my love my head tells me do, not be foolish
But my heart, my heart is breaking, should I whisper louder my love

I have not the strength, to whisper much louder,  it makes no difference
On the far horizon, I see you or is it an illusion,
Your so young and beautiful do not look that way at me, my love
What chance do I have my love if you look that way at me 

Your mesmerizing eyes affects me my love, my heart cries, for me my love
How can I let you go, but you must not want me my love...
It's not right to want me I know I've whispered in the wind, my love
Didn't think you heard me my love.. now here you are

What do I do know, I've never felt so alive my love,

The intensity of this love, it's not right to keep you my love,

Do not cling to me I must let you go, although the fire in my heart
Will keep burning for you, my love.

                                       .By Connie James.

To Begin The Beginning ...

                    

                                        
To Begin The Beginning ...

At the light of  dawn, the door opened as he walked in,       

Had to brace, myself  from the morning cool breeze.
Ahh...I closed my eyes as I inhaled the scent of him
I just couldn't believe he was standing there, before me.

Looking so magnificent so knowing so dangerous
We stood facing one another...for what seemed an eternity

I standing there smiling shyly...uncertain of what to do,
I just followed his lead...I held my hand to touch the contours

Of that much -desired face, to touch to feel,  to want !!!
He just stood there, looking at me with that devil look.. may care..

Doing absolutely nothing with this insolent look, daring me!!!
Daring me, to me explore, so with uncertain hands,


I explored every inch of he.. was mesmerized by this god man like

Standing before me, with this mesmerizing look, in his eyes. 

Hypnotizing me, I felt myself awakening, as from a deep, deep sleep
Wanting to touch, wanting what I knew not...what!!

But he knew how to play me sweet so sweetly,

The waves of sensations driving through, me
I prayed o lord, let it not stop...it must not stop, yet I held back
For I knew, if I didn't I'd be lost forever...forever lost...

This awakening had me feeling weak so weak
 Forever in my mind remembering, remembering wanting to repeat,
 My brain exploded, the sensations he put me through, wild so wild.
Yet it left me wanting of what I wasn't sure,

Uncertain my mind was crying out, there must be more,
There must be more, much more of that I was sure,

There had to be, to repeat the experience, terrified me

For I knew I won't hold back...I had this wanting in me

Innocent as I was...wanted to feel the sensations...sweet, so sweet
Holding me back, left me wanting, more & more
Never going through the process, as if punishing me.
Why won't you go away you're just tormenting me 

Yet again he held me close, sensing my uncertainty

The knowing look in his eyes, seeing the frustration in me

Smiling he said, Just looking out for you, don't you see 

Worry not my love It'll keep, it'll keep.

                                          
                                           By Connie James.

 

You Went AWOL Moon

Moon, moon where are you, you went AWOL don't you know
I looked near and far, but you were hiding behind,

That gossamer net, like clouds, I stood around waiting just waiting 

Could not settle looking, looking for you but my dear moon, where were you. 

You went away from me, then I spied you chasing after Venus
I saw you all aligned, Mercury and Mars. But that wasn't enough for you

You had to chase Uranus, Jupiter, and Pluto to
But don't you know moon, there's an Earthling down here waiting for you 

She needs you to shine on her, don't you know you mesmerise, her

That beautiful face of yours, like no other
I looked high and low, right across the firmament
There was no sign of you moon, but I knew you were there.

I stood camera in hand to record your first entrance,
But you were playing hard to get, and left me with this imbalance
From starring up to the sky's, people thought me mad.
At times I see you there, with Venus just beside

Mars not so far away, its distinguishable by the red tinge around, it 

This alignment is amazing, I saw with my own eyes

With the help of my binoculars, It was an amazing sight,

But you see my dear, my dearest moon

Theirs a being down here. Waiting just for you

Each time you show your face, what a magnificent moon say I

You mesmerize me, so out of reach. But you now hide

Behind those gossamer clouds, you enchanting moon you.

Don't you know, you always affected my moods

I become rather irrational that's no joke.
I point you out to my children saying look at that beautiful moon,
That magnificent moon, come on my baby's howl, howl at the moon

Everyone joins like a load of banshees

Howling, howling at you.

Is it strange or not, am afraid I don't know...

but the moon, has always affected me so.

                                                  

                                                By Connie James .

Behind You Dark Window

Why do you hide from me my love, behind your darken window
Yet I know you're there my love... but you hide, hide from me
Do you remember not what we were when we were so much in love
Or was it an illusion my love, the obsessiveness need for the other 

Our whole beings were obsessed, with the idea of being in love
We had eyes for no other...and now you hide behind you're, darken window

Pretending you're not there and my heart screams, out for you

To hold me tight yet my love you hide behind you're, darken window

The ecstasy of your nearness drives me wild with this need for you
But I must say, my love, you're so far from me, from the way I feel for, you
For you care not my love  what I feel inside of me! this yearning.
This yearning that I feel for you, yet you hide behind your darken window
.

You remember my love, as we to run around teasing, teasing one another 

Laughing,  laughing like no other...the eloquence of your words, drove me spare.

It was burning, burning in my mind as no other could share,

The meaning of those words. left a deep sensation, inside of me

Yet you hide behind that dark window just ignoring me
Yet once upon a time, our hands were so busy exploring,
Exploring one another oblivious of, everything around us
The words, the sweet, sweet words that tumbled from our lips

Quenching our thirst, as you were my first love
Yet my love you seem to have forgotten as you hide behind you window

Why are you, my love,
Punishing,  me is there a reason my love

You just don't love me ..I was mesmerized by your words

I must say silly me,  but one question not. 

The words of love.
When one is young and free.

                                        By Connie James.