Feb 9Th

Feb 9th
Many moons ago on this day, I was born
On this paradise Island in the Sun
Oh what a gay day one would have thought
As Mama took me home, on that fated day
A pretty little thing I was not, so they said
Grandmama hissing...
Aren't you ashamed to bring that home...
As if two heads had, I!
A ray of sunshine she was not.
Know not what mama said or thought
She talked not a lot my mama harassed, was she
By the she-devil that Grandmama was!
My early years, many memories I have not!
Except, for my brother my playmate,
Papa was my world, my hero my everything...
Also, remember screaming having fallen over a kettle
of boiling water...
Not Mama fault I'd say...
Was burnt such a lot still, have the scare to this day!
Brought home to me, one must not leave a kettle
Where a child can reach!
Mama must have been out of her mind
Papa being home not but, at his music practice...
A stick insect was I thin, as a rake through my early years
Did she care for me, I know not...
Am I being a misery?
From the others differently, she treated me not
I guess her hands full must have been,   
Cannot remember she hugging me...
In between the years remember much not busy asa bee was she...
I guess I haven't made it easy.
I understood not why outsiders would say,
That she'd be the best of the lot...
Their meaning I knew not, Mama like-it not a lot 
Am I being unfair unkind, easy her life was not,
I know not!!
An ugly duckling was I or so thought I!
Thinking back, many moons ago growing up...
Confounded was I
My body I liked not, my bum my boobs, oh Lord
My neck giraffe-like, too long for my liking
My feet enormous thought I...
Why so ugly was I?
For I was made not to feel otherwise!
Self-conscious hating those outsiders stares,
I abhorred passing by men, they stared such a lot
Hissing hated it embarrassing, I understood not 
So innocent was I!
I knew not nought at all, I knew bugger all!! 
The bane of my life they were...
I knew not how to act, what to say
So I became detached from my feelings switching offmy mind... 
Following stalking me, I guess today you'd say
Their attention welcomed not in any way...
But I came through this lark of this growing up, stage
Unscathed I'd say, giving myself not to anyone
Mama would have skinned me alive!! 
No no Siree!
I was meant for the one from across the waters,
Loaded he came with cameras hanging from his neck...
In a blink of an eye, he'd recorded every angle of me
On his camera lens !!...
Mad I thought was he, didn't know what he saw in me!! 
Go away said I!!
But a seed he'd plant on my mind, so slowly germinating. 
Until one day a butterfly metamorphosing
from that chrysalis that was I...
Becoming aware that he'd show, time and time again
From his neck at all times cameras hanging...
Am here am I, many moons since an ugly duckling was I
Just one love!!... 
But there are times, I think I need more than I need
Experiencing not any other, missing something comes to mind!
Wondering if the blue-eyed, on my mind         
What can one say, when one thinks one needs
Much more than one needs...
He's embedded on my mind after, all many moons
Have gone by, I know not...   
I know bugger all!!