Alone!!

As I wake up my worlds pressing down on me
There's a weight upon my heart
A gossamer over my eyes wake up I want not
There is sorrow in my heart
Why lonely must I always be
If those in my world understands not me
What I am or what I'll be!!
Turmoil residing within me...
My mind ambiguously chastising me, not thinking
Spontaneity rules my world my life
Always not thinking
But the ambivalence in me living from day to day
One day at the time my way!
Care not always what I do or say
My nature is to love those in my world...
& if at times my language fall's by the way
In something I do or say
To speak my mind has always been my way!
But if those in my world care not to hear what I say
Best stay away from a mind that thinks not always
Reasoning not what I am what I'll be who's to say
At war with my mind all the way
If careful I must be my mind filters not
In anyway
My thoughts convoluted not in any way
Flowing through without thinking good or bad...
Why must I be this being weighing not what I thought
Is this the essence of me!
This being that knows not, copes not with day to day living
The turbulence within my thoughts, letting not
Escaping from the recesses of my mind
That does not sing and dance at all times
But sinking into the mire of my thoughts
When there's doubt within my mind
I'd much rather sing and dance at every change
Except darkness robbing the light, my eyes
Dispersing not that gossamer impeding the light
In darkness alone my mind
Alone!!